Tag: KitschMix

Transgender Day Of Remembrance 2020 – KitschMix

Transgender Day Of Remembrance 2020 – KitschMix

Today is Transgender Day of Remembrance. Our community began marking this day in 1999 in response to the brutal killing of Rita Hester, a Black Trans woman.

Hester was a member of the Boston LGBTQ+ community who worked locally on education around trans issues and nurtured many of the city’s LGBTQ+ youth. She was killed in her home on November 28, 1998, a few days shy of her 35th birthday. Twenty-two years later, her murder has not been solved.

On the first anniversary of Hester’s death, trans advocate Gwendolyn Ann Smith organised a vigil to commemorate Hester and all transgender people lost to violence since her death. That vigil began the tradition that is Transgender Day of Remembrance.

“When the Transgender Day of Remembrance first began, trans people were nameless victims in many cases,” Smith wrote in 2014 for The Advocate. “Our killers would do their best to erase our existence from the world. And law enforcement, the media, and others would continue the job.”

Researchers have documented 350 homicides of trans and gender-diverse people around the world from October 1, 2019, through September 30 of this year have been brutally killed.

That’s a 6 percent increase from the same period a year earlier, and the researchers have recorded 3,664 homicides since the effort began in 2008. The yearly total has gradually increased since then.

This number is likely higher; victims are, to this day, often misgendered in local police statements and media reports, which can delay awareness of deadly incidents.

Trans women or those who identify as transfeminine made up 98 percent of the victims in the 2020 report. Eighty-two percent of the deaths were in Central or South America, and 43 percent in one country in that region, Brazil. Sixty-two percent of those killed were known to be sex workers.

The majority of these victims, like Hester, were Black transgender women living at the intersection of racism, homophobia, and transphobia.

“Behind the statistical representation of numbers and percentages, there are people whose lives we value and who we, as societies, failed to protect,” the release says. The group blames social stigma and criminalisation of sex work for exposing trans sex workers to exploitation and violence, while adding that the COVID-19 pandemic has put the lives of trans people at even greater risk, especially the young, the poor, sex workers, migrants, and people of colour. Racism and police brutality are contributing factors as well.

“At the same time, those groups are repeatedly silenced and underrepresented within our communities and societies,” the release concludes. “Although COVID-19 affects us all, social differences and inequalities are deepened by the pandemic, emphasising gaps in lack of legislation and systemic protection of trans and gender-diverse people.”

We must do better by continuing to condemn all acts of violence against transgender people. Vigils and celebrations will look different this year due to the pandemic. Nonetheless, today we pause to recognise the lives of those we have lost.

The following organizations are fighting for that change.

Janelle Monáe Says She Felt ‘Pressure’ To Talk About Her Sexuality – KitschMix

Janelle Monáe Says She Felt ‘Pressure’ To Talk About Her

Janelle Monáe has been speaking publicly about her identity for several years, and in 2018 she stated she was a “queer Black woman” who “has been in relationships with both men and women.”

In this months cover interview with Out magazine Monáe explained that she chooses not to talk about her relationships in public, but realised she would have to come out, she said: “I knew because of my art, I would have to talk about these things. So that put more pressure on me.

“The most important thing was me having conversations with my family. It was important that my family be reintroduced, not to the little girl they grew up knowing that they called ‘pumpkin’ or they knew was into this or into that, but they knew who I was today — that they knew that I was a free-ass motherf**ker.”

Monae added: “[Something] I identify with more than ever is the concept of coming in — and people coming into your life — and not coming out. I think there’s so much pressure put on people that can’t afford to announce to the world that, ‘I am queer’ or ‘I’m gay.’

“[I hope people can] talk about their sexuality and being queer, being gay, or being who they are, they can talk about it, not out of fear, but out of love and celebration for who they are.

“If people look at me as that beacon of hope, that’s great, but I always tell people don’t feel any pressure to be me. Take your time.”

Monáe added: “My hope is that we can continue to showcase the spectrum of storytelling around Black voices and around Black human beings, stories that humanize us.

“We can go beyond trauma, showing how powerful we are as Black people to persevere through trauma. I’m ready to see us in the past, the present, the future truly experiencing joy on screen and what it means to just exist.”

At the Oscars earlier this year, she gave an epic shout-out to Black History Month and made clear: “I’m so proud to stand here as a Black queer artist telling stories.”

Monáe explained of her Oscars moment: “[There are] so many people who have graced stages, who are out protesting and who are fighting to have their voices heard. I just happened to have a mic.

“To get on that stage and do anything other than that, would not have felt right to my spirit.”

Monáe added: “My hope is that we can continue to showcase the spectrum of storytelling around Black voices and around Black human beings, stories that humanize us.

“We can go beyond trauma, showing how powerful we are as Black people to persevere through trauma. I’m ready to see us in the past, the present, the future truly experiencing joy on screen and what it means to just exist.”

7 Qualities Of A Love That Is Timeless – KitschMix

7 Qualities Of A Love That Is Timeless – KitschMix

Have you ever sat down and spoke with someone whose romantic life completely inspired you? I’m talking those stories that shake you to your core, the kind of love that you’ve been dreaming of since you were a kid. These are the types of love that are so special, when one partner passes away, the other can’t even imagine the idea of being with someone else. What could make one person so special that they truly became irreplaceable?

And, better yet, why would anyone want any other kind of love?

We’ve done a bit of digging, and we found out that these are the 7 things that make a love truly timeless – and little ways you can start to incorporate the power of timeless love in your own relationships. By following these rules in all your relationships, you can assure that you will one day find that lasting love.


1) Timeless love is priceless.

There’s no monetary value assigned to true love. Small gestures of love and affection mean so much more than a million gifts, and they help to create memories that will last a lifetime. This deep, immaterial love doesn’t care how much money you have in your bank account, your wallet, or the cup holders in your car.

Simply put, if you need a price tag to quantify your love, your relationship is not meant to last. Financial situations can change at any time, but true love is here to stay. Value experiences over gifts and your love will be strengthened against the tests of time.


2) Timeless love is sincere.

Timeless love stories don’t usually start with love at first sight – but they do involve trust and affection from the start. The way you act around your partner tells much more than your words, and in a timeless love, your words and behaviors reflect truth. Dishonesty will destroy a relationship faster than almost anything else, so relationships that rely on mistruths will never survive.

The way you treat your partner – even when she’s not around – reflects not only your relationship, but also the way you feel about her. She deserves love, respect, and trustworthiness from the very beginning – if you wait until tomorrow to start, it may already be too late.


3) Timeless love is protected.

Most partners don’t go out of their way to hurt their other half, but timeless lovers selflessly go out of their way to be at their lover’s side. They are assured, shielded, and appreciated because they assure, shield, and appreciate their partner. Their bond is strong because they fortify it every way they can.

To create protections in your love, you need only to see your partner as your partner in a journey toward self-improvement, happiness, and your ultimate goals. You need to support each other and see each other as teammates – never rivals.


4) Timeless love is intense.

The strongest loves are those which are full of passion, emotion, and energy. There’s no time for mediocrity, because these relationships require two people enthusiastically persisting toward mutual goals and a shared vision. They’re not afraid of the storms, because they know there will be rainbows after.

There’s no way to fake an intense love, but you should be able to sense it early on. An intense relationship doesn’t need to be a rollercoaster of emotions – it just needs the emotions to be clearly on display for both partners to see. They won’t all be happy emotions, but the more emotions there are, the more will be happy.


5) Timeless love is unique.

Timeless love never happens in the traditional ways – a once-in-a-lifetime relationship is only going to come around once in a lifetime. These loves thrive on creativity to build memories, and the couple is always graciously hoping for more adventures together.

Get out of your comfort zone and make those adventurous memories together – there’s no substitute. Everyone’s idea of adventure is a little bit different, but in a timeless love, you and your partner will enjoy similar types of adventure (even if you don’t agree on what the best kind is).


6) Timeless love is positive.

I’m sure we’ve all seen the movies where the tender-hearted girl-next-door falls in love with the rebel rogue and the two go off to commit crimes together – but that’s not true love. True, timeless love exudes optimism, even in the darkest hours, and it makes you want to be a better person. Timeless love relies on two people trying to work towards their higher calling in life – and encouraging each other to reach for the stars.

Thankfully, timeless love makes you a believer in optimism. It’s the sort of love that puts a smile on your face when the cheesy love songs come on the radio. It’s the type of love that makes you feel invincible, like you can conquer literally anything – as long as she’s by your side.


7) Timeless love is loyal.

The biggest difference between a timeless love and a relationship is that a timeless love is irreplaceable. Your partner isn’t just your girlfriend, she’s The One. She’s the one you’ve been waiting for your entire life, and you truly feel that you belong to one another. Even if things were to unexpectedly end – due to death, divorce, or just a matter of circumstances – she’ll hold a place in your heart that no one else could ever fill.

It’s important to realize that just because a love is timeless does not mean that it’s invincible. Things can happen at any time due to factors outside of our control, but that doesn’t make the love story any less meaningful.

Do you have a story of timeless love to share with us? We’d love to hear it! Drop it in the comments section below, and let us know if there was anything else that made it so special.


11 Signs You’re Too Good For Your Girlfriend – KitschMix

11 Signs You’re Too Good For Your Girlfriend – KitschMix

When you love someone, you give without expecting anything in return. It’s about the feeling you get when you do nice things for her – not that you do them so that she’ll do something else for you. Still, one-sided signs of affection can lead to resentment, frustration, and downright exhaustion. If one of you is actually playing a bigger role in your relationship – not just overclaiming what you do – an unbalanced feeling might be a sign that you’re too good for your girlfriend.

Of course, it’s up to you whether you stay or go, but if you find yourself in most of the following 11 signs, you deserve so much better – and you’d probably be happier single than with your current partner. How many can you spot in your relationship?


You’re shut out of her life.

Happy, healthy couples share their goals, their plans, and their big decisions with each other. It’s normal to keep your distance in the beginning, but there comes a point where your lives will either pull you closer or push you further away – and a partner who shuts you out isn’t trying to get closer to you.


You fantasize about life without her.

It’s normal to occasionally think about how your life would be different without the person you care about, but there’s a distinct difference between thinking about and fantasizing about. If you find yourself drawn to the idea of breaking up, most likely you should – there’s a reason your mind is somewhere else.


She undervalues you.

Everyone brings value to someone else’s life, in some way or another. If your girlfriend doesn’t see the value that you bring to her life, she’ll never appreciate or respect you. A happy partner would consider your abilities and benefits as part of the team, listen to your opinions, and appreciate your contributions to the relationship. If she’s not doing those things, you owe it to yourself to find someone who will.


Your need for affection is not being met.

Everyone has their own needs within a relationship, but healthy relationship involves a compromise between one’s needs and the other’s boundaries, as much as possible. If you’ve already expressed a need for more affection to your partner and she won’t even consider it, she’s not the one – I promise.


She treats you like a child.

It’s normal to get frustrated with each other when someone’s acting immature – but if your partner is talking down to you and treating you like you’re a child, there’s a problem. It shows a lack of respect, and it shows a desire to control – neither of which is cool in a relationship.


You don’t feel respected or appreciated.

I know I already touched on respect in the last one, but the same is true for appreciation. While you shouldn’t do things just for the recognition, a partner who doesn’t acknowledge the blessings you bring into her life may not actually see any – which is, most likely, a reflection of her rather than of you. Find yourself someone who appreciates everything you are.


She would rather have sex with you than talk to you.

If your girlfriend uses sex as a way to change the subject or avoid having a conversation with you, it might be a sign that sex is all she sees you for. Some aromantic relationships can get by just fine without any conversation, but if the feeling isn’t mutual, it can cause a number of problems between the two of you – best to put an end to it as soon as possible.


You don’t know her friends and family.

It’s completely normal to wait for a relationship to settle in before bringing your boo home to the family, but if you’ve been together for over a year and you don’t know anyone in her life, there may be other issues that you wouldn’t expect. Are you sure you even know her?


You don’t feel like you can trust her.

A lack of trust in a relationship can be a sign of insecurity, especially if one partner just had their trust destroyed. But there’s also a chance it’s your inner intuition telling you the things you don’t want to admit to. Either way, the two of you don’t belong together if there’s no trust involved – the relationship will never be able to grow.


You don’t talk about anything real.

Small talk and shallow conversations are all well and good, but that’s not what intimate relationships are made of. If you never touch on the issues, you can never hope to deal with them, and if your partner discourages talking about your hopes and dreams, too, she’s probably hoping she’s not in them.


You’re not happy, you’re just comfortable.

Relationships aren’t pure magic every single day, but if you can’t remember the last magical day after a few seconds of thinking, your relationship has already played out and it’s time to move on. It’s not fair to either of you to remain in a relationship that doesn’t bring you joy at least most of the time. Only you know what happiness truly means to you, but you owe it to yourself to find it.


11 Signs You Were Made For Each Other – KitschMix

11 Signs You Were Made For Each Other – KitschMix

Samira Wiley and Lauren Morelli Tell Touching Engagement Story
What causes some relationships to end once the newness rubs off, and what causes some to grow and thrive? While there is no one answer that rings true for everyone, there are a few signs that your relationship is more than just a passing phase. These 11 things lead to greater compatibility and a love that gets better with age – just like a fine wine. Are you and your partner meant to last? Check this list and see how many signs are in your relationship!

You’re best friends.

There’s a reason that we’re so inclined to crush on our besties – it’s because a good friendship can make for a great relationship. When you find the woman who was made for you, she’s eventually going to become your best friend. What’s even better is she’s a best friend who will encourage you to have other friends, too – a great relationship doesn’t mean locking yourselves away for all of eternity.

You respect each other.

Respect is one of the pinnacles of a good relationship, whether it’s romantic, sexual, platonic, or somewhere in between. If you and your partner were meant for each other, there will be a level of respect that’s hard to come by. You might not always agree on everything, but you know what’s important and you put your relationship ahead of your ego.

You bring balance to each other.

Amazing relationships aren’t about being exactly alike – they’re about finding someone who complements you in a way that makes you amazing when you’re together. If one of you is an obsessive planner, the other might be super spontaneous. If one of you is brash and gruff, the other might be cheery and optimistic. Love is about finding balance, and partnering up with someone who meets you in the middle.

You open up to each other.

True love is about honesty and communication. The woman who was meant for you will allow herself to be vulnerable, particularly if it sets you at ease. She’d rather hurt you with the truth than please you with a lie, but most of all she wants to create a truth that does please you. She doesn’t mind doing it, because she knows you feel the same way about her.

You belong to each other.

There’s no settling involved here – what you two have is a bond between souls. You feel complete with each other, and you couldn’t imagine things being any better with anyone else. You might occasionally have a wandering eye, but in the end you know that the strangers on the street could never compare to what you have at home. Staying loyal isn’t a challenge because you know she holds your heart.

You’re into similar things.

Love is about balance, but there are also shared interests. The two of you might have a hobby you participate in together (go you!), a show you watch religiously every date night, or maybe it’s a mutual love of rescued kittens. Whatever it is, you two have “your thing” and you love geeking out together. She’d never judge you for the fandoms you belong to, because she’s probably in half of them too… And it’s always nice to have someone to recap with.

You excite each other.

The spark fades a bit slower in a relationship where you’re meant for each other – you know all the buttons to push to keep things fun and exciting. Just the fact that you adore one another makes the most boring tasks seem a bit more bearable, so when it comes to the things that are already fun, you’re in absolute bliss. Just being around her brings a smile to your face, and there’s no doubt she thinks about you when you’re apart.

You see both strengths and failures.

True love isn’t about finding the perfect person – it’s about loving an imperfect person in the most perfect way. When you find the woman who’s meant for you, you’ll be there to help motivate her towards success, but you’ll also need to be able to pick her up when she struggles. She’ll be by your side doing the same for you, too. You’ve got the tough job of playing cheerleader and coach, but it’ll all be okay, because you’re going through it together.

You understand each other.

As much as love requires you to talk things out, partners who are meant for each other will start to develop their own nonverbal communication, too. The two of you understand the intention behind words, even when they sound unpleasant (or maybe even mean). You also know how to listen for the things that aren’t said, because you know each other well enough to notice when something’s off. Most of all, you want to understand each other – so if something isn’t clear, you ask questions until you get through it.

You support each other.

When you meet the woman who was meant for you, you’re going to feel like you can conquer anything. She’s not your sidekick or your boss, she’s your partner and she wants to see you achieve all your wildest dreams. She might not always share your vision, but both of you understand that you don’t need to be headed to the same place. As long as you’re headed in the same direction, you can get there together.

You feel genuinely happy – often.

There will always be frustrations and other things going on, but when you’re with the woman who was meant for you, those things have a chance to disappear for a little while. Being with her feels like a safety net, or like a warm fluffy bed on a cold winter day. You look forward to spending time around her because she actually distracts you a bit from the less savory parts of life. She gives you a sense of home – and that’s one of the greatest pleasures in life.

10 Things To Know About Sex With An Introvert – KitschMix

10 Things To Know About Sex With An Introvert –

So, you heard that introverts were secretly the best girlfriends, and you successfully wooed one. Now what? Dating an introvert can seem like a daunting task, especially if you don’t fully understand what introversion means. Thankfully, though, we’ve outlined this handy guide of the top ten things you need to know about sex with an introvert. For best results, read through this guide before having sex with her for the first time – she’ll definitely appreciate it!

Sex is more exhausting for us.

Sex is an inherently exhausting activity already, but introverts have a particularly hard time recuperating afterward. This is because is physically and mentally draining, and if she feels even the slightest bit pressured into it, it’s going to be emotionally draining, too. Give her time, and she’ll warm up – it’s not a race to the finish.

It’s hard to talk about what we really want.

Many introverts have a hard time expressing what’s on their mind – even if their happiness depends on it. It’s not because we don’t like people, or because we’re too sensitive about what other people think of us. It’s because small talk feels like a barrier placed between people, and it’s super awkward to start a conversation with sex as its primary focus. Still, if we tell you we want or enjoy something, don’t take it lightly – we’ve thought it through before saying it out loud.

Intimacy comes long before we do.

Where extroverts tend to thrive on physical closeness first, introverts prefer to get to know someone deeply before we open ourselves up to them. This means that we take a little longer to get close to, but once we do let you in, you better believe we’re excited about it. We need foreplay every time to help us get comfortable, and it’s always a good idea to ask permission before pressing forward.

Observation is essential.

Introverts are naturally observant of the world around us – we’d prefer to sit on the sidelines watching others have fun than actually participate. It’s not because we’re boring, it’s because we take note of all the details. We’re responsive to our partner’s needs, and we expect a partner who can be responsive to ours, too. This attention to detail makes us excellent lovers, but if you aren’t equally perceptive, your introvert lover might get bored.

Distractions happen sometimes.

While no one is completely prone to distraction, it means something totally different to an introvert. Extroverts tend to be more easily distracted in environments that lead them bored and unstimulated, while introverts are more likely to wander off if there’s too much going on. Rest assured that, just because her mind isn’t totally present when you’re being intimate together, that doesn’t mean she’s not enjoying herself – it means she’s enjoying herself so much that her mind can’t focus on any one thing.

Casual sex can be super awkward.

While most of the introverts I personally know have tried casual sex a time or two before, it usually isn’t “for” us. We’d prefer to form a deep emotional bond with someone, baring our soul before our body – and even that, slowly. We’d rather keep a few people extra close to us than have hordes at arms’ length, so we don’t like to spend a lot of time or energy on people we don’t expect to speak to again.

It’s hard for us to get things started.

Introverts are more likely to be satisfied with less sex than their extrovert partner, which means we’re probably not going to bring it up when we want it. Even when we do want it and it hasn’t been initiated yet, we may be reserved because we’re still thinking things over. Having a partner who can take charge of the situation is wonderful, and a partner who knows how to properly use teasing as a sexual tool is sure to please for years to come.

Our fortress of solitude is not for sex… Usually.

Everyone needs their own space from time to time, but an introvert’s need for alone time is much higher than an extrovert’s. We prefer to have our own safe place to retreat to, somewhere quiet where we can recharge after stressful situations. Since sex is a pretty tiring event, we probably won’t want to stay long after – we need to get back to our comfort zone to rest up. If we bring you into our safe place, it’s important that you respect what it means to us – sharing our private spaces is very difficult for us.

We probably won’t be turned on after a party.

While extroverts may find the excitement of social situations arousing, introverts don’t get the same rush. The exact feelings may be different from one introvert to the next, but most of us would feel more comfortable if we had time to recharge in between. Many introverts prefer morning sex as our social batteries have had time to recharge – we don’t feel sexy when we’re drained from the day’s interactions.

Sitting silently afterwards is 100% not weird.

As much as we value our alone time, introverts also enjoy spending quiet time with the people we need in our lives. Sometimes that means cuddling, once we feel comfortable sharing our space with you, but mostly it just means stolen moments of silence in between activities. We don’t need to fill the air with empty words – we’re comfortable just being near you, and that really is special.

4 Words That Are Killing Your Relationships – KitschMix

4 Words That Are Killing Your Relationships – KitschMix

It’s hard to think that something as little as word choice can have a profound impact on anything – even though we know how easy it is to be misunderstood. While all misunderstandings are generally bad, there are some specific words that might be wreaking havoc on your love life – even if you don’t even realize you use them.

Of course, there are appropriate and inappropriate ways to use each of these words, and just because it comes up in conversation doesn’t automatically mean your relationship is over, but the more often you use these words against your partner, the more likely things are to go sour.

How many are you saying too often?


You

What you say: “You never talk to me anymore!”

What she hears: “This is all your fault!”

When you start your complaints with the word “you,” it sounds accusatory – and your partner is going to feel like you’re blaming everything on you. It points the finger at her without taking your emotional response into consideration. However, most relationship problems aren’t solely one person’s fault – it takes miscommunication on both sides.

What to say instead: “I feel like we don’t talk as much as we used to.”

When you change your statement into one that reflects your feelings, you’re sharing your perspective, instead of placing blame. It gives your partner the opportunity to help your hurt feelings, instead of putting her immediately into defensive mode.


Expect

What you say: “I expected you to have a job by now!”

What she hears: “You’re not the person I want you to be.”

Although no one is immune to expectations in a relationship, it’s important to remember that your partner is not automatically held to your expectations for her. Sure, it would be nice if she did the things you expected and didn’t do the things you didn’t expect from her, but that’s not how life works. Your expectations for her may be vastly different than her expectations for herself, and unless you fully communicate, she’ll never even know what you want. Telling her that she doesn’t meet your expectations will only make her feel like a failure.

What to say instead: “I would prefer if I wasn’t the only one working.”

You can’t fix a missed expectation that’s already past – all you can really do is work on fixing it in the future. It’s also important to realize that she has to want to fix things – you can’t hold her to the vision in your imagination. Instead, focus on what you want, and open the door for discussing those wants. Keeping the focus on your wants, instead of her shortcomings, helps keep the tone a little more positive.


Must

What you say: “You must empty the trash before I get home.”

What she hears: “I’m in charge around here, so do what I say.”

The word “must” (or “have to,” if that’s more your style) asserts dominance over the other person in the conversation. It positions you as an authority and your partner as someone inferior. It takes away her ability to think for herself, because you’re handing over a to-do list. It can lead to resentment in the long term, especially if your partner isn’t the submissive type.

What to say instead: “It would really help me if you could take out the trash before I get home.”

This simple shift makes the statement one about helping you, instead of serving you – something most partners would lovingly do. It gives her room to think for herself, because you’re making a comment, not a command. It replaces the balance between the two of you so that you’re equals, not boss and employee.


Should

What you say: “You should take better care of your car.”

What she hears: “I’m smarter than you.”

The idea that you know what someone else should do – yikes! It’s a slippery slope. It generally comes from a place of judgment, even if it doesn’t feel like you’re being judgmental at the time. When you tell someone what they should do, you’re also telling them that you think you’re an expert, and that you know their situation better than they do. That’s not generally a good approach to take with your partner.

What to say instead: “I would love if you kept your car cleaner.”

Just like with the statements above, shifting the focus from her to you will make it more of a romantic gesture if she decides to comply – she won’t just be doing it because she feels threatened. You should still be aware that she’s not obligated to change – remember, that’s why we’re focusing on you. But, if your partner knows it’ll make you happy if she did the thing, she might be more likely to do the thing than if she just feels like you’re nagging her.

It’s Time To Step Up – KitschMix

It’s Time To Step Up – KitschMix

To us, strength has no identity, and solidarity should have no race.

We can’t continue with business as usual. This week, we’re suspending our regular schedule to focus on content related to this struggle, the fight against white supremacy and the fight for Black lives and Black futures

We’re working hand-in-hand with our team to shape our plan for better representation, not just for now, but for forever.

It’s on us – all of us – to learn about racial prejudice, to develop the understanding of those who don’t, and to take time to self-educate on the challenges under-served communities face. Not just in America, but across the world.

This week all our channels will be used to educate and encourage others to fight for a positive change – we will work to support our local communities and develop further initiatives.

We’re utilising our internal education platform to circulate – and give access to – a library of resources, in order to increase the awareness of equal rights.

This initiative aims to provide a deeper understanding of the injustice and inequality that millions still face.

It’s time to donate

Black Lives Matter pioneer in the movement to fight for freedom, liberation and justice. Leading the way in providing a voice for Black people, BLM provide the resource for further understanding of racial prejudice, opening the eyes of the world to the challenges many people face, whilst offering an opportunity to make change.

With hundreds of charities helping communities, we understand that it can be difficult knowing where to direct your charitable donations.

By no means a comprehensive list, here is a short index of organisations that you can donate to right now to make an immediate difference.

  • Black Lives Matter – a global organisation which creates space for Black imagination and innovation, whilst providing an educational platform.
  • Black Visions Collective – a black, trans, and queer-led social justice organisation and legal fund based in Minneapolis-St. Paul.
  • The Bail Project – a nonprofit that aims to mitigate incarceration rates through bail reform.
  • We love Lake Street – an organisation helping to rebuild the Lake Street community in Minneapolis which has been affected by recent riots.

Ways You Can Help

As well as the educational resources below, being vocal is a crucial step in gaining awareness and promoting the need for change. 

Here is a list of petitions and further ways you can help.

Educate yourself

There is no guidebook to eradicate racism. There are however, multiple insightful resources and learnings that have been published to help educate you, and your community on the history behind the movement. 

Below, a variety of non-fiction, and fiction works by authors that help paint a visual representation of both pain and injustice, which aim to unite all races in the fight for equality and freedom.  

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BOOKS / AUDIBLE

11 Lies About Break-Ups We’ve All Fallen For – KitschMix

11 Lies About Break-Ups We’ve All Fallen For – KitschMix

Let’s take a few minutes to talk about something unpleasant: Breaking up with your girlfriend. Especially around the holidays, break-ups can send you into the deepest, darkest pits of your soul, holding your happiness captive. Sometimes break-ups are messy, and people get hurt. You invest so much of your time, energy, and emotion into this one person and it gets harder to see the other people out there. This is especially true at the end of a toxic relationship where the partners are so involved in one another’s lives that they’ve literally lost touch with the outside world – friends, family members, anyone who used to mean the world to them before they entered their relationship.

To make matters worse, the brain doesn’t really like the idea of change – even positive change. Our brain, masquerading as our heart, takes bits and pieces of things and refuse to fully let go. It’s why you get nostalgic when looking through old pictures, and why you get teary-eyed when you remember your childhood pet. We appreciate things more after we’ve lost them, after all – so why would our romantic partners be any different?

Properly handling a break-up is one of those life-skills that isn’t automatically programmed into us, though – we’ve got to learn it (often the hard way). One of the first steps in resolving your break-up process is understanding that these 11 things are total bullshit.

“One last romp… For old time’s sake.”

There is absolutely no reason you need to sleep with someone one more time when you break up. Not only does it set the precedent that you’re only good for sex – which can drastically lower your self-confidence – but it also reinforces all the bonds you’re trying to break. Think about it: That’s like finding out you’re allergic to peanuts, and then chomping down on one last bag “for old time’s sake.” It’s not going to make the pain of the allergy any less severe, and it won’t make the pain of your break-up any less severe, either. It’ll just encourage you to fall into the same patterns you have, and make up with someone you really don’t belong with.

“The fastest way to get over someone is to get under someone else.”

Whoever started this line of thinking was clearly not looking out for anyone else’s interests when they first said it. The idea that you can move on by forcing yourself to move on completely undermines the grieving and reflecting process – both of which are essential to healing after a break-up. Your brain has withdrawals from oxytocin and it wants them to be dealt with as soon as possible – pushing you toward making irresponsible sexual decisions and placing unfair expectations on your new partner. Love yourself first, in every sense of the word, and be prepared for what the next relationship has in store for you, instead of forcing yourself to relieve your past relationships indefinitely. It might sound hokey, but it’s absolutely necessary.

“We can still be friends.”

I’ve always marveled at people who could stay friends with their exes after a bitter break-up. Once someone has crushed your feelings so completely, can you actually completely forgive them? Well, yes – but not right away. It’s impossible to be “just friends” with someone you have romantic feelings toward. Once those feelings are gone, things might be different – but they might be so different that you have no desire to be friends with this person anymore. It’s important that you focus on your mental and emotional health instead of trying to hold onto the past. It’s always going to sting a little to see when she’s moved on, but if you’ve still got feelings for her when it happens, it’s going to be devastating. Save yourself the heartache and opt to do your own thing until you’ve healed.

“It’s all her/my fault.”

Okay, so technically this one counts as two misconceptions, but the basis of both of them is exactly the same. Break-ups are very rarely (with extra emphasis on both parts) black-and-white or one-sided. Even if the relationship itself felt unbalanced, there was still one of you who frustrated the other, and the other who didn’t tackle those frustrations head-on. Everyone makes poor choices, but the wise among us learn and grow from those mistakes. Learning how to forgive can be difficult, but it’s essential that you forgive both yourself and her. I’m pretty partial to the forgiveness meditations within the Calm app myself – these forgiveness meditations are offered for free and have done wonders for improving my ability to let go of the past.

“Break-ups make you fat.”

I’ll admit that I’ve gone through a number of break-ups where I had gained a fair amount of weight by the time I met my next partner. I’ve also had break-ups where I lost a tremendous amount of weight before it was all said and done. It really comes down to how you handle it. The most successful way to handle a break-up is to use it as an opportunity to improve yourself – join a gym, start eating healthier, or just spend some time walking in nature every day. You’ll be amazed at how much of a difference it makes.

“Being single again sucks.”

Many people (myself included) don’t like the feeling of being single. Humans are social creatures, after all – even the most antisocial introverts among us need some type of interaction. But that’s not singledom that sucks – it’s loneliness, and they’re not one and the same. It’s all about your attitude: Will you choose to be happy today? Have you made a plan for how to handle your new single life? And, perhaps most importantly, have you taken the time to cherish, appreciate, and revel in your freedom?

“I’ll never fall in love again.”

Of course you will. Humans are social creatures, remember? Eventually the day will come when you’re drawn to someone else, and if you’ve closed off your heart to the idea of finding love again, it’s going to be really hard to cope with the “what might have beens” that are soon to come your way. I do believe that everyone is capable of having a truly timeless love, but to be quite blunt, if you broke up… This one wasn’t it.

“It came from totally out of the blue.”

When you hear someone say this about the end of their relationship, you can guarantee that – in their mind – they are painting their ex as a saboteur of romance. But break-ups are rarely spontaneous. There are almost always signs that things are on the rocks, but many people choose to ignore what they consider “bad news.” It’s good that you choose to focus on the positives, but ignoring the fact that your relationship was on the rocks is not the right type of optimism. Someone else’s feelings are on the line here, too.

“I can get through this break-up the same way I’ve gotten through every other break-up.”

Wouldn’t it be great if you could figure out the secret formula and end all the pain of break-ups for the rest of your life? Well, that would be great – but chances are, finding that formula would get rid of the need for a break-up in the first place. It’s not a lost cause, though, as long as you’re actually learning things from the relationship. Each and every person – and every relationship – is different, so if there really is a pattern forming, there might be some tough introspection to do – repeating the exact same mistakes will never lead to new results.

“I’m already damaged, so what’s the point in trying?”

If you’ve ever thought that it was too late to improve your life, or that you were just “bad at relationships,” you’re not alone – but you’re also the victim of a fixed mindset. It’s never too late to make your life better, because humans are ever-evolving and growing into different people. As long as you’re steadily making progress towards the better version of yourself, you are improving. Even slow progress is better than no progress at all.

“I can change. I deserve another chance.”

Well… Yes and no. It’s entirely possible that you can change, but do you really want to be making those changes to appease someone else? If you’re not making changes for yourself, your motivation will waver and you will mess up. It’s part of the process. (Even if you are doing it for yourself, slip-ups happen.) These slip-ups will damage the trust, respect, and self-worth in the relationship – are you sure you want to risk resentment?

More than just that, your ex is allowed to be happy, too, and she doesn’t owe you a second chance any more than you’d owe her one. No one has the right to expect someone else put their own happiness on the back-burner to your wants. Let her go find her own happiness, and take care when cultivating yours. Your second-chance will come, but it might not be with her, and you need to accept that before you can move on.


What To Expect When Dating An Introvert – KitschMix

What To Expect When Dating An Introvert – KitschMix

For as long as I can remember, I’ve preferred my own company over the company of others. Some of it is anxiety, I’m sure. Some is probably insecurity.

But so much more of it is simply because I’m an introvert. I spent a lot of my childhood trying to fix my introversion – mistakenly thinking it was something I was just doing wrong. As I’ve grown up, however, I’ve learned that there’s nothing wrong with taking time for myself. Not only is it something I enjoy, but it’s something that I need as an introvert.

Introverts aren’t necessarily shy (although many are), they just cherish their quiet stillness and value their alone time. They recharge by themselves, as opposed to extroverts who are recharged by the energy of other people. That doesn’t mean an introvert and an extrovert aren’t compatible – it just means you need to know what you’re getting yourself into.


Introversion isn’t just one personality type.

While people are generally categorized as “an introvert” or “an extrovert,” the truth is that there is a lot of complexity within those two core types. When it comes to introverts, there’s a spectrum ranging all the way from antisocial introverts (those who would prefer to be alone because they think other people are terrible) to ambiverts (those who need time to be alone, but also need time around other people). Somewhere in the middle, there are selective introverts and shy introverts – those who are particular about the people in their lives and those who get nervous around new people, respectively.


Most introverts fall in the middle.

When you think of an introvert, you usually think of the antisocial introvert, but realistically most introverts aren’t antisocial – just selectively social. No one is in their life randomly; every day they interact with someone is a conscious choice. They are very choosy about who they get close to, so they’re not generally surrounded by a very large circle. You can trust that, if you’re in the circle of an introvert, they’ve already decided that you’re worth their time.


Introverts prefer deeper conversations.

Where extroverts can strike up a conversation with whoever they encounter, introverts don’t have such a luxury – so they’re very selective about the things they say, as well as who they say them to. Their conversations have direction and purpose, which means they’re not drawn to drama or mindless bickering. They’d prefer to work things out rather than just fight and argue.


Introverts are amazing listeners.

Introverts are attentive and thoughtful, and they take time to thoroughly process things before replying. This means that they won’t jump to hasty conclusions or speak just to hear themselves talk. They are concise with their own words, so they can better understand yours – including the ones you can’t express so well. If they can tell that it’s important to you, they’ll do their best to help you work through it.


Introverts are understanding, but they need you to understand, too.

Maybe it’s because of how much understanding they require in a relationship, but introverts tend to be some of the most understanding partners – as long as you’re not hurting them in the process. They need to feel appreciated and loved, so they’ll make sure you feel appreciated and loved. They need you to reach out first, because sometimes it’s hard to take that first step, but once the conversation starts, they’re ready to face it.


Introverts aren’t strangers to leaps of faith.

Generally speaking, introverts would prefer not to take unnecessary risks – so if the intro you’re interested in has given you the greenlight to pursue, understand that they’ve already invested a lot of thought into whether or not you’re worth it. They understand that love is a risky game to play, so just taking a chance on you is already a huge deal – make sure you’re playing fair!


Introverts need their own place to retreat.

It’s nothing personal, and it speaks nothing of your relationship, if the introvert you love needs to retreat to her own sanctuary occasionally (or often). Introverts need peace and intimacy, and they’d rather spend quality time with you than spend every minute by your side. Trust them, and respect their boundaries – the time you spend together is immensely valuable to them.


Introverts want to know their partner is satisfied.

Introverts are natural-born people-pleasers (well, with the exception of the antisocial introverts, of course). They will step out of their comfort zone if they think it will make their partner happy, and they remain concerned about their partner’s satisfaction during the entire relationship. They want to make sure you feel loved, appreciated, and happy from the first date to the very end.


Introverts are respectful whenever possible.

Your introvert love interest understands your need for personal space and privacy, because those are some of the deepest needs they have. They have high levels of emotional intelligence and would never want to impose. They also want to know that you feel your opinions are valued in the relationship, and they want you to speak up if something feels off – a roadmap to your happiness would likely be followed to the letter if you gave one.


Introverts are committed and loyal.

Relationships are a serious commitment to an introvert – they won’t enter one until after they’re sure of the other person. They may opt for loyalty before official title, and you might expect that you’re the only one they’re talking to even if you’re “just talking.” Cheating is out of the question – why would they stray from the person they’ve already committed themselves to?


Introverts will surprise you with their joy.

Just because an introvert needs a little extra time for themselves doesn’t mean that they’re boring – they just get joy from the simpler pleasures in life. The experiences they share with their most important people are precious, and they’ll enjoy those memories for years to come. To top it all off, they’ve got a witty sense of humor and are sure to make you laugh in the most unexpected ways.