Special to lesbian.com
“Two Dads Under the Christmas Tree” brings to you fun, touching moments, and a deep sense of humanity as you experience Jayden’s first year with his two dads. In an effort to raise awareness about adoption throughout the world both the Italian and Spanish editions are also available. These editions will help reach countries where same-sex couples and single individuals who wish to adopt are discouraged or even denied.
My name is Jayden. I was born on the night of December 24, 2017 in Washington, D.C. in the United States, and this is my story. Or maybe, I should say my first story…
No matter how hard I try, my memories of the first few days are jumbled, to say the least. I can only say that at some point – I don’t know how, I don’t know why – I managed to get out – thank goodness! – from that dark, damp tunnel in which I had been floating for about nine months.
Let’s be clear: I’m not complaining, but a little fresh air after so much seclusion has never hurt anyone.
In short, I was out! And although the light was a little too bright for my liking, and someone had been shouting and fussing all throughout the process, I felt quite satisfied with myself.
Since the beginning, I think I slept a lot and, in addition to a sensation of total relaxation, I do remember many excellent bottles of milk and people of all kinds constantly fumbling with me, flipping me over like a small chicken on the grill, and the pleasant feeling of being in the clouds.
Then, suddenly, I was in a rather cozy home with soft lights and gentle whispers filling the air. Outside the window, I saw little pieces of cotton falling out of the sky and… two dads under the Christmas tree.
My crib is absolutely soothing and I plan on spending as much time in it as I possibly can. Even the background music – this guy Mozart – is not bad and it helps me sleep pretty well.
And the room service is top notch. With one cry, the staff starts moving. With two cries, one dad enters the room and the other one goes to the kitchen. With three, I already have the bottle in my mouth.
Sometimes, even if I’m not hungry, I try to play if the “call service” works and I punctually see them jump.
In fact, I think they are a little tense. A dozen times a day, even at night, they suddenly undress me looking for a dirty viper – that’s what they say. I don’t know exactly what they do, because unfortunately, I can’t see well from my position, but for a while they lift my legs up and down and never find anything.
And every time, they talk about a certain ointment to put on me, which, in my opinion, smells terribly like poop and is probably good for keeping vipers away.
Today, when I woke up, there were many people bent over me. My dads said they were friends who came to visit me. But what kind of friends were those?
They all tried to kidnap me or use me like a football! Dads were vigilant, though, and everything went well.
Well, all of it, except for the huge puke I threw up on a lady who bounced me for ten minutes straight with a stupid smile on her face.
In the end, she was no longer laughing.
The following excerpts are from Tobias Mile’s new book “Two Dads Under the Christmas Tree” (True Colors Lab, LLC Publishing, 2020) and are reprinted with permission from the publisher.