Tag: Lesbiancom

the things we’ve learned about making an LGBTQ family – Lesbian.com

the things we’ve learned about making an LGBTQ family –

Special to Lesbian.com

If these ovaries could talk“There is no simple way for LGBTQ folks to have babies. There are so many decisions that we have to make because we have too much of one thing and not enough of the other. Two women have two uterus (or is it uteruses? uteri?), but they don’t have sperm. Two men have all the sperm in the world, but come up short in the eggs and hopper department. And with trans fertility, the questions are more specific to each individual or couple, but that doesn’t mean there are fewer questions to be answered.

In terms of paths, you can embark on the scientific route, but you’ll need to figure out who will carry the baby, whose egg will be used, who will donate the sperm, who will go first. Perhaps you’ll consider using a surrogate, IVF, IUI, or even trying at home with what we like to call the “turkey baster method”. You may think about adopting. If you do, you’ll need to figure out if you want to adopt internationally or domestically or if you want to use an adoption lawyer or private agency. And don’t forget there’s always the option of being foster parents.

Wherever you fall on the LGBTQ spectrum, if you want to have a kid, you’ll have to figure out how to make that baby. And no matter which path you choose, it will cost ya…a lot.

Now, you’d think there would be a lot of grumbling from LGBTQ folks about how hard it is to make families. Well, we’re here to tell you that hasn’t been our experience. The folks we’ve talked to have made thoughtful decisions and were deliberate and intentional at every turn. Instead of the process feeling like a cross to bear, every choice they made defined and illuminated their families in love. And that’s beautiful.”

Robin and Jaimie share about their stories too like that time Jaimie assumed she’d be the one to carry their babies.

“I have always wanted to birth a child. Being gay never once deterred me. It just solidified the fact that I had to partner with a woman who wanted to be a mother and felt no need to carry. Luckily, Anne fit those criteria.

So, imagine my shock when Anne said to me, in a bar, a month after our wedding, ‘Ya know, I think I wanna have a baby.’

‘I’m sorry, what?’ I asked calmly while trying not to choke on the beer I was having trouble forcing down my throat.

My anxiety kicked in. I made Anne promise that if we do this ‘you have a baby’ thing, I still get to have mine. She assured me that she wouldn’t back out of our agreement, we would have two children, no matter what. I forced her to pinky swear her loyalty to the plan religiously throughout the next five years it took to get that second baby in our arms.”

And Robin’s path to parenting had some twists and turns too.

From the moment my wife and I learned about reciprocal IVF (using my eggs but Mary would carry) we were all about it. The idea that we could make a baby who would have my genetics, but literally be made from Mary’s bones, seemed like the coolest science experiment ever invented.

We knew that was how we would create our family.

The downside? It would cost around $26,0000, and we only had enough money to try once. That meant no more IVFs and no more savings account. But we were blinded by the idea that the baby would be made of the two of us, so we forged ahead. It wasn’t until we were handed ten different prescription forms that we began to question our plan. I couldn’t help but think about the fact that the odds of us having a successful pregnancy in one round of IVF were not on our side. Not to mention what we would be putting ourselves through physically.

That’s when my wife said, “Are we going about this the hardest possible way?”

The answer was, “Yes.” We loved the idea of the baby coming from both of us, but we needed to prioritize being parents and being fiscally responsible over needing our baby to be from both of us. These are the decisions us L, G, B, T & Q’s have to make.

If These Ovaries Could Talk: The Things We’ve Learned About Making an LGBTQ Family includes stories from actor and comedian, Judy Gold, State Senator, Zach Wahls, poet, activist, and author, Staceyann Chin, America’s Got Talent alum, Julia Scotti, and The Abbys from Bravo TV.

This book is an informative, in-depth journey that is equal parts funny, serious, happy, sad, celebratory, cautionary, and powerful. Robin and Jaime compare the journey to parenthood for LGBTQ folks to a roller coaster ride. “At first, you’re really excited. The car chugs up the hill, clink-by-clink, and suddenly you’re wondering when was the last time they tightened the bolts on the tracks? That’s how it is when you’re spending a lot of money trying to have kids in a world that’s not set up for families like yours. You just have to hold on and try to enjoy the ride.”

Excerpt(s) from If These Ovaries Could Talk: The Things We’ve Learned About Making an LGBTQ Family. Copyright © 2020 Jaimie Kelton and Robin Hopkins. All rights reserved. Reprinted with permission from Lit Riot Press.

 https://www.litriotpress.com/if-these-ovaries-could-talk-the-things-weve-learned-about-making-an-lgbtq-family 

SCOTUS victory for LGBTQ rights – Lesbian.com

SCOTUS victory for LGBTQ rights – Lesbian.com

BY NCLR

“For the first time, this historic decision ensures that LGBTQ people have nationwide employment protection and represents a monumental step that will help to create a safer working environment for everyone.” — Imani Rupert-Gordon, NCLR Executive Director

To say we were happily surprised this morning is an understatement. Just last week the federal administration repealed HHS rules protecting LGBTQ people from denials of healthcare, even though the Affordable Care Act prohibits such discrimination. That callous targeting of vulnerable communities happened on the same day we remembered and mourned those lives lost in the Pulse Orlando shooting.

Today is a celebration! The Supreme Court of the United States has now issued its ruling in three Title VII cases, holding —in no uncertain terms— that LGBTQ people ARE protected from discrimination under federal law.

“This is a huge victory not just for LGBTQ people, but for our country, which benefits enormously when LGBTQ people are permitted to participate and contribute on equal terms,” said Shannon Minter, Legal Director of NCLR. “Today’s decision will be remembered as a watershed in the history of LGBTQ rights, even as our country continues to grapple with the brutal legacy of racism. The transgender movement owes a particular debt of gratitude to Aimee Stephens, who courageously fought this battle in the final months of her life.” — Shannon Minter, NCLR Legal Director

WHAT IT MEANS TO YOU: HISTORIC SUPREME COURT TITLE VII RULING
with NCLR Legal Director Shannon Minter
Wednesday, June 17, 2020
12:00 PM (PT)/3:00 PM (ET)
REGISTER NOW

While LGBTQ people now have legal protection from discrimination at work, we still have a long way to go to secure comprehensive federal protections for our community. But this ruling gives us something we haven’t had in a long time: Hope. This ruling opens the door to progress. We will continue to fight for equality and we will continue to win.

Tags: lesbian legal rights, lesbian rights, NCLR

Posted & filed under Activism.

A Personal Silver Lining – Lesbian.com

A Personal Silver Lining – Lesbian.com

BY LEE LYNCH

I thought there could be no good news.

Not in the midst of a pandemic and the mass selfishness that hastens and continues its spread.

Not when the abiding depth of U.S. racism bubbles to the surface without shame or remedy.

Not when the vainglorious puppet of the far right “that struts and frets his hour upon the stage” continues to assault everything we’ve done right as a country and tout as successful every evil we continue to perpetrate.

Even as this circus of horrors rolls on, I have been able to privately celebrate two personal milestones. I have broken my record for a long-term relationship. Only by a week so far, but what a relief to get beyond the jinxed anniversaries of my past. My sweetheart and I have started our fourteenth year together and we’re okay. Really okay.

Earlier this year I hurtled over a second pitfall: I now have lived in the same home for over seven years. At age eighteen I was privileged enough to leave my parents’ apartment and attend college. In the span of the next fifty years, I moved twenty-three more times. Not a world-shattering amount, but enough to necessitate recreating home, and sometimes my life, far too often. A number of the moves came as a result of break-ups, or of trying to make a relationship work.

It’s true that I want to change the world, but there is much to be said for stability. I was always performing at top speed, always devising ways to use time more efficiently, keeping sleep to a minimum. Only now am I beginning to learn to do one thing at a time—multi-tasking was normal and necessary. My pace was an attempt to make up for the hours and energy I too frequently lost to moving out, moving in, breaking up, starting again.

Short-term relationships seemed to be the norm in lesbian life at the time. It would be decades before I met women who had been together since high school or college or since coming out. The first such couple I met said the secret to their success was simply, “Be kind and love each other.” I had already foresworn leaving relationships and I taught myself to do as the couple advised. But it wasn’t always up to me to pull the plug. So I moved, and moved, and moved on.

My heart longs for solutions to the various wrongheaded conflicts tearing our world apart. Who am I kidding? These frictions have always been our inheritance. Racism is not new, nor is income inequality or incompetent, power hungry leadership. All are plagues, as malignant as the current viral scourge.

I see our single friends suffering from lack of companionship, touch, and safety, to evade this illness. African Americans, Native Americans, and gays, among others in the U.S., have never been guaranteed safety at all. Neither have my sweetheart and I, but we, at least, have respite in each other.

More than ever, I am grateful to have at long last found unwavering love and a home where it can thrive. While constancy won’t slow the rise of fascism, or appease alt-right activists, or allow us to go without masks, we are stronger for it, and strength is what is needed to repel the advance of the recurring infamies we now -— and perhaps always -— face.

Copyright 2020 Lee Lynch / June 2020

George Floyd is just the tip of the iceberg – Lesbian.com

George Floyd is just the tip of the iceberg –

Angelic Williams MyUmbrellaBY ANGELIC WILLIAMS
MyUmbrella

For the past several days I’ve been receiving emails from different groups condemning the murder of George Floyd. Like many of you, I’m angry, I’m frustrated, I’m exhausted. But not just because of George Floyd, or Breonna Taylor or Ahmaud Arbery. I’m exhausted because of the systematic racism and discrimination that I and other Black people have felt for our entire lives in this country.

Let me explain.

So many of these emails have stated a few things that have floored me including:

– We’re committed to doing everything we can to support the black community
– We’re cannot stand on the sidelines while these injustices are taking place

Capitalization.
These may not seem problematic on its face but it is. To the first point, the b in Black should be capitalized. We give the same respect to Hispanic, Latinx and Caucasian people. Why don’t we provide the same respect for Black people?

Standing on the sidelines.
This is 100% problematic because it insinuates two things:

– You saw these injustices as wrong chose to do nothing
– Your privilege afforded you the ability to not give it a second thought because it has no impact on your day to day life

While I’m grateful that more people have woken up, I also notice the timing of these emails have come after the numerous protests over the weekend rather than when the murder took place.

Growing up Black isn’t easy. While most kids get “the birds and the bees” talk from there parents, we have discussions about what it means to be Black in America, how to speak in mixed company, and so on.

– It means being followed in retail stores because they think you’re going to steal something.

– It means being stared at by White people when you’re in a fancy restaurant or staying at a nice resort. I can’t tell you the number of times people asked if my dad played football as if that’s the only way we could be in this position.

– It means watching people hold the purse closer to their body when you walk by or lock the doors to their car because you must be a criminal.
– It means watching droves of White people storm state capitals with rifles freely, while peaceful protesters are tear-gassed, beaten and arrested.
– It means being harassed by law enforcement with or without cause. There’s a phrase for this, DWB: Driving While Black.

As for myself, the situation runs deeper. As a Black Queer woman, there is no part of my identity that can claim a sense of privilege. When I look for respite in the other communities that make up the other parts of my identity, I see mirrored forms of discrimination.

There are groups for women that exclude non-binary and trans women and are predominately geared towards White women.

There are LGBTQ+ groups large and small mostly run by White men, that have just as many problems with race as the larger society does.

To these two groups, I’ve often asked myself the question: is this intentional? Are you just emulating mainstream society as a result of wanting to prove you’re just as good as them? Or is that because you see yourself in the crowd you don’t notice anyone is missing?

It’s not enough to put diverse faces on a flyer and say you’ve tried. That’s the equivalent of putting gender neutral restroom signs in the workplace and claiming you’re now a champion of diversity and inclusion. While well intentioned, if this is the only action taken towards dismantling discrimination, these actions are purely performative rather transformative and is a far cry from true allyship.

I firmly believe people are “waking up” to this injustice because our lives have been stopped by a pandemic and therefore don’t provide the convenient distraction it normally does. So many of these emails have vowed to do their part to end police violence.

For us Black people, we know that will never be a reality. David McAtee was killed by Louisville police less than a week after George Floyd. My hope is for accountability by the people carrying out these murders.

I challenge every single person to take a hard look inside themselves to address the racism or biases they have, the challenges their organizations face and how to do better going forward. Not just at this moment in history.

For those of you who don’t know how to start their journey of introspection, try starting with the Five Whys technique.

I’ll leave you with this quote, “If you think you are too small to make a difference, try sleeping with a mosquito in the room.”

Join ‘Ahead of the Curve’ at the Drive-In on June 27 – Lesbian.com

Join ‘Ahead of the Curve’ at the Drive-In on June

For many of us right now, the thought of celebrating anything is unfathomable. We contemplated how best to approach our film’s world premiere, while recognizing and honoring the time we’re living in, and realized that making space to tell queer stories is in itself an act of resistance. Sharing the story of a visionary and unapologetic celebration of lesbian life is an act of resistance. Our movement was forged in joy and struggle — as queer people, our very existence is resistance – let’s use our joy as a powerful and nourishing tool to fuel our fight. Being together with our community for this night of celebration will energize us to keep doing the work that needs to be done. TICKETS.

We’re excited to announce that tickets for the World Premiere of AHEAD OF THE CURVE at the Drive-In are on sale now. Taking place on Saturday, June 27th at the West Wind Solano Drive-In Theater in Concord, CA, as part of the Frameline44 Pride Showcase, a limited block of tickets are available now at Frameline.org. Definitely get yours asap, this event will sell out fast.

To help make the film accessible to those who can’t attend the Drive-In in person, we’ve worked with Frameline to make a limited number of digital streams available as well. Please visit Frameline’s Digital Screening room for tickets.

Franco, Jen, Rivkah, and everyone on the AHEAD OF THE CURVE team can’t wait to share the story of Curve Magazine with you.

WORLD Premiere – 2020 Frameline44 Pride Showcase
Special Screening of AHEAD OF THE CURVE
Saturday, June 27, 2020
West Wind Solano Drive-In Theater
1611 Solano Way, Concord, CA

Tickets available here.

Tags: Ahead of the Curve, Jen Rainin, lesbian documentary, lesbian film

Posted & filed under Entertainment.

‘Good Kisser’ offers fresh take on lesbian romance – Lesbian.com

‘Good Kisser’ offers fresh take on lesbian romance – Lesbian.com

San Francisco, CA – Wolfe Video, the largest exclusive distributor of gay and lesbian films, today announced the early digital release of Wendy Jo Carlton’s critically acclaimed feature film, Good Kisser.

The film will be available for purchase and rent on May 19, 2020 ahead of its DVD release set for June 16th, 2020. Good Kisser will stream on a variety of digital platforms including Apple TV, Amazon Prime Video, FandangoNOW, Google Play, VUDU and WolfeOnDemand.com.

From award-winning writer/director Wendy Jo Carlton, (Easy Abby, Jamie and Jessie are Not Together), comes this fresh, romantic ride, brimming with mind games and erotic tension.

Kate and Jenna want to spice up their relationship by opening it up to a third and plan a date with the enchanting Mia. Jenna becomes enthralled with Mia’s sexual confidence and charm, and as they spend the evening dancing, drinking tequila, and sharing secrets, the women become entangled physically and emotionally. But what was intended as a night of fun soon exposes the cracks in Kate and Jenna’s relationship. Careful what you wish for.

Written and directed by Wendy Jo Carlton, who has been making female-oriented queer movies for two decades, Good Kisser features an ensemble cast starring Kari Alison Hodge, Julia Eringer, Courtney McCullough, and the feature debut of Rachel Paulson (younger sister of actor, Sarah Paulson).

“It’s amazing to work with Wolfe to share my new feature romance with the world, as their prowess will help us reach an audience that is hungry for more quality queer cinema,” says Wendy Jo Carlton.

“We have wanted to work with Wendy Jo Carlton for years and are glad to have that opportunity with the release of her sexy new film, Good Kisser. We are excited to share her portrayal of an authentic lesbian experience with our loyal Wolfe audience,” says Kathy Wolfe, CEO & Founder at Wolfe Video.

Wendy Jo Carlton directed her first feature, Hannah Free, starring Emmy-winner Sharon Gless, in 2009. Her second feature, Jamie and Jessie are Not Together, is said to be the first lesbian RomCom musical, with film critic Roger Ebert giving it a glowing review, and AutoStraddle.com listing Jamie and Jessie are Not Together as one of the “Top 100 Lesbian Movies of All Time”. Her award-winning lesbian web series, Easy Abby, received 50 million views online, and is now an Original Series on Revry.tv.

Wendy Jo Carlton is an Associate Producer on the award-winning documentary, Circus of Books, executive produced by Ryan Murphy, on Netflix (2020).

Follow @goodkissermovie on Facebook, Twitter and Instagram for the latest release updates.

Watch on WolfeOnDemand.com.

LGBTQ+ app MyUmbrella relaunches – Lesbian.com

LGBTQ+ app MyUmbrella relaunches – Lesbian.com

This pandemic has effected every person around the world. We’ve been thinking about what we can do to help during this difficult time. For the first time, the world is on a collective pause, allowing time for reflection/introspection like never before.

As a result we’ve decided to full pivot to be an online platform that provides a creative outlet for members of the LGBTQ+ community. Unlike other platforms, we invite members of the community who want to share their stories the opportunity to do so, by joining our Writers Cohort. Check out some of the featured stories below.

Explore the site now at MyUmbrella.co.

Posted & filed under News.

Tony-nominated Sydney Lucas Joins EPIC for new virtual series – Lesbian.com

Tony-nominated Sydney Lucas Joins EPIC for new virtual series –

EPIC Players Inclusion Company is proud to release their fourth virtual performance, Ring of Keys from the Broadway production of Fun Home. The video features a duet between Tony Nominated Sydney Lucas and EPIC company member Nicole D’Angelo. The performance is part of EPIC’s new virtual performance series, EPIC Sings for Autism, which was started after EPIC’s spring/summer performances were put on hold due to the COIVD-19 Pandemic. The New York City based neuro-diverse theater company created the series so their autistic performers could have a creative outlet and find some normalcy during this time.

Lucas shared what drew her to collaborating with EPIC, “Fun Home has had such a positive impact on so many people. I recognized this very early on and have always felt a responsibility to tell Alison’s story to the best of my ability. Learning that it touched Nicole (D’Angelo) and really spoke to her, touches my heart as well.” She went on to say, “I wanted to raise more awareness about autism because it’s another story that needs to be told, and another group of wonderful people who need to be recognized and acknowledged. After all, Ring of Keys is a song about recognition. Meeting Nicole over ZOOM was extra special and getting to sing Ring of Keys together with her is the cherry on top. Fun Home has taught me that when you invest in matters that have the ability to reach into another’s heart, your heart is all the fuller for it. It’s really a beautiful thing to experience!”

EPIC company member D’Angelo went on to say, “Fun Home is the reason I am in theater, and in many ways saved my life. It was such an honor to perform a song from the first show I ever saw that made me feel like there was a place for me, a queer, socially awkward introvert, on a stage, and to share that performance with Sydney Lucas, who helped to shape and create the musical that means so much to me.”

Ring of Keys from the Broadway Musical Fun Home

Book and lyrics by Lisa Kron, music by Jeanine Tesori. Featuring Nicole D’Angelo and Sydney Lucas.

In an effort to spread some much-needed joy and inspiration, EPIC’s company members,’ which feature artists on the spectrum, will continue to share a series of virtual performances throughout the Spring. Many of the video’s will be in collaborations with Broadway talent. The company would also like to connect with additional Broadway talent who may be interested in working on a virtual performance with EPIC. Interested individuals can contact Aubrie Therrien at aubrie@epicplayersnyc.org

Individuals living with autism and other neuro-diversities have been severely impacted by the COVID-19 pandemic, which has shuttered many of their essential resources, programs and supports and left them even more vulnerable to anxiety and distress.

Additional Videos from EPIC’s Virtual Performance Series:

A Whole New World from the Broadway Musical Aladdin

Music by Alan Menken, Lyrics by Tim Rice. Featuring EPIC company member Jordan Boyatt and Telly Leung who played the title role of Aladdin on Broadway. Accompanied by Scott Evan Davis.

YouTube: https://youtu.be/_tfIqUsJ_NA

Vimeo: https://vimeo.com/414538753

Who I’d Be from Shrek the Musical!

Performed by EPIC’s Travis Burbee and Henry Houghton, and featuring special Broadway guest, Analise Scarpaci (Lydia Hillard in Mrs. Doubtfire the Musical!/Broadway). Lyrics‎ by ‎David Lindsay-Abaire, and music by ‎Jeanine Tesori.

YouTube: https://youtu.be/SE2Mqi27pnc

Vimeo: https://vimeo.com/410846266

If the World Only Knew

This original song was created by award-winning composer and lyricist Scott Evan Davis who also wrote and composed the new musical Indigo, which workshopped on Broadway this past fall. If the World Only Knew was created for the autistic community and was shared with EPIC for their Lincoln Center cabaret.

YouTube: https://youtu.be/9Ch58BdhYzk
Vimeo: https://vimeo.com/404823802

EPIC Players — which stands for empower, perform, include and create — is a nonprofit, neuro-diverse theatre company in New York City. Founded in 2016, EPIC seeks to use the performing arts as a vehicle to empower neuro diverse artists and pioneer increased inclusion in the arts. EPIC also provides free performing arts and careers classes for all participants. The company’s productions feature neuro-diverse artists that work in all capacities of theatre including acting, writing, stage management, design and backstage work. Past productions include neuro-diverse adaptations of The Little Prince, The Tempest, Peter & the Starcatcher, Dog Sees God, You’re A God Man Charlie Brown, Little Shop of Horrors, and numerous cabarets as Joe’s Pub, HBO Headquarters and Lincoln Center.
www.epicplayersnyc.org

Facebook: www.facebook.com/epicplayersnyc
Instagram: www.instagram.com/epicplayersnyc
Twitter: www.twitter.com/epicplayersnyc

Is there a doctor … – Lesbian.com

Is there a doctor … – Lesbian.com

By Lee Lynch
Special to Lesbian.com

It’s that time again. I need to find a healthcare provider.

I live in a rural community where there is a large turnover of medical professionals and a constant shortage of qualified staff. The health organization that provides these services seems to have difficulty attracting talent. It’s common knowledge in the communities it covers that it’s a tough employer to work with.

Which isn’t to say there are not entirely competent professionals devoted to their patients and performing at least as well as their big city peers. I’m the one who’s chosen to live where the question, “Is there a doctor in the house?” may well go unanswered.

My primary provider is pursuing the next step in her career—a step at a deservedly higher altitude. She’s a Physician Assistant, but I couldn’t trust someone with a full medical degree more. She’s perfectly straight, yet never blanched when the issue of my queerness came up. Although she was not taking new patients at the time, she graciously made room for my sweetheart in her practice. How will we ever replace her?

Of course, I asked the same thing when my former doctor left. We all loved her. Once, I had to go into her office and the New York Times was up on her computer screen. Bonding moment! Another time, I answered my phone and it was a call from a liberal election phone tree. I recognized my doctor’s voice and she admitted to thinking she probably didn’t need to give me her spiel. Double bonding! Then she was gone.

This year, for the first time, I chose a Medicare Advantage Plan with the aforementioned difficult local health organization. The lure was partial coverage for dental, acupuncture, and vision, bless their hearts. Now I’m limited to the medical providers who are left on their roster after mine departed. Woe is me.

One of my major concerns is finding a gay-friendly person, preferably female. I’ve always taken my chances, but after the phone tree doctor left, I tried Dr. X. Oh my gosh, what a mistake that was both for me and, I later found out, for all her patients and the staff. It’s not difficult to intimidate me and Dr. X was a master at it. She was medical s&m and there I was, a homosexual beneath contempt—and this in the twenty-first century! I mean, you believe what your doctor says, you trust her, you follow her instructions. But Dr. X was just plain mean. She was expert at identifying vulnerabilities and using verbal ice picks to stab them.

So, I’m cautious now. I’m on tip toes. I’ll travel hours to see someone with whom I’ll be compatible.

My retreating PA had some suggestions, but not one of them is taking new patients in this time of COVID19 and rural staff shortages. I’m grateful she was able to rule out a few pairings she knew would be lethal, to either me or to the doc.

Friends recommended a good woman MD, but she’s employed by the Health District and thus, not covered by my plan. Two other recommendations looked excellent, but are not taking new patients.

Facebook can be helpful once in a while. I posted to a local lgbtq and straight page whose members were generous with suggestions. There was a well-recommended P.A., but the contacts, responding to my search for a female provider, expressed uncertainty that the recommended individual was identifying as female.

Meanwhile, our delightful new lesbian neighbors have also been looking for healthcare, and one actually scheduled an appointment with a woman MD in town, then cancelled when the plague hit, so no input there yet.

Do non-gays have this much trouble finding care? And how do other lesbians approach this headache? Should I simply call the clinics and ask if they employ a professional who is gay friendly, wait for the pregnant pause and assurance that everyone is treated equally, and the inevitable willy-nilly listing of doctors who can squeeze us in?

There’s a neat website, out2enroll.org , which has a search engine for gay-friendly doctors. I plugged in my zip code. The response: “No providers match your search. Try removing some search criteria.” Maybe it works in San Francisco, a ten-hour drive from here in good weather.

And then there’s https://www.outcarehealth.org/outlist/. Same response. HRC has a list, but it only includes hospitals for my state—

Our medical center is not listed. I actually noticed, when I signed up for the Advantage Plan, that sexual orientation is not included in its Equal Employment statement.

What’s a dyke to do? What I’ve always done. Make an appointment with an unknown quantity and hope for an open-minded practitioner who thinks gay patients are as valuable and deserving of respect as heterosexuals. She’s out there, it’s just a matter of enduring a Dr. X or two until I find her.

Copyright Lee Lynch May 2020

NCLR tribute to Phyllis Lyon – Lesbian.com

NCLR tribute to Phyllis Lyon – Lesbian.com

Phyllis Lyon and Kathy Wolfe

Phyllis Lyon and Wolfe Video founder Kathy Wolfe.

NATIONAL CENTER FOR LESBIAN RIGHTS
Our community shared a collective sadness with the news of Phyllis Lyon’s passing on April 9th at the age of 95. An indicator of how much the world has changed in her lifetime, her fierce and indomitable presence was celebrated and honored well beyond the LGBTQ community. We have linked to some of this national coverage below.

For the National Center of Lesbian Rights, Phyllis Lyon and her partner of 58 years, Del Martin, were guidestars. One of the proudest moments in NCLR’s history was representing Phyllis and Del in California’s marriage equality case. Phyllis and Del’s courage paved the way for marriage equality under the California Constitution.

Phyllis and Del were the first same-sex couple to be married in San Francisco on June 16th, 2008. Merely weeks later, Del passed away at age 87 with Phyllis by her side. What came before that moment was decades of activism, boldness, humor and love.

NCLR’s former executive director and dear friend of Phyllis Lyon, Kate Kendell, shared this incredible timeline of Phyllis’ life.

This moment to celebrate Phyllis is also a moment to reflect. In 1955, Del and Phyllis were founders of the Daughters of Bilitis, the first lesbian civil and political rights organization. They were the first lesbians to join the National Organization of Women. Phyllis, once an administrative assistant to Rev. Cecil Williams at Glide Memorial Church, and Del played key roles in launching the Council on Religion and the Homosexual (CRH) and the Alice B. Toklas Democrative Club and, in 1979, became the namesakes of an activist-created health clinic, Lyon-Martin Health Services. These are just a few examples of their activism and involvement.

As a feminist-founded organization, NCLR stands on the shoulders of Phyllis and Del. At our inception in 1977, the women’s rights movement and the Gay movement were changing the political landscape, but lesbians had difficulty finding a seat at either table. Phyllis Lyon was just what we needed. When Donna Hitchens founded NCLR, it was to meet the immediate and dire needs of women losing their children because of their sexual orientation. Today, NCLR’s mission is to hold the heart and create equity for our entire LGBTQ community. No one left behind. Period.

Phyllis Lyon knew no boundaries when it came to her intellectual and activist power and we are forever indebted to her for her bravery and leadership. She set an example for us all. We know for us at NCLR, we intend to do whatever it takes to follow her lead and hold up her legacy.