Welcome to NSFW Sunday!

La Muxer Diosa and Zoie Blackheart

La Muxer Diosa and Zoie Blackheart in Crash Pad Series episode 281

Pink & White Productions founder and Crash Pad Series director Shine Houston is rewriting the rules of great queer porn. Here’s how she got started:

“By acting on her desire to see queer, trans and gender-nonconforming performers of color in porn, Houston tapped into a hugely underserved audience looking to see their own sex lives and fantasies reflected back to them. All the while, their bodies were treated with care, respect and even reverence, which again, left a powerful impression. In an impassioned post, blogger Black Thighs writes, ‘[Houston’s] work is important simply because it speaks to desire — the desires of Black womxn — and unclenches desire from pain and from shame, as our desire has always been conditioned.’”

Blair and Megan Reeves

Blair and Megan Reeves in Crash Pad Series episode 279

At Zora, Adrienne Maree Brown discussed emergent strategy, pleasure activism, what Black liberation looks like for Black women and more:

“Emergent strategy and pleasure activism really go together. Folks see all the ways that we normally experience and find pleasure and connection are not happening because of the pandemic. We are also being called into action, both online and in the streets. Being able to tune in and take action together is actually giving us a deep sense of connection, of being a part of something larger than ourselves. When you see people standing in their dignity it feels like a good touch, right? I want to keep feeling that. That feels and looks irresistible.”

Daisy Ducati and Ella Nova

Daisy Ducati and Ella Nova in Crash Pad Series episode 186

Here’s how to be a better top.

Conflict is (still) not abuse.

At Mel, Penny, a Toronto-based escort and lawyer, writes about staying safe as a sex worker in the pandemic, noting, “masked sex is a lot less awkward than you might think.”

At the Cut, Raven Leilani, author of Luster, discussed the best sex she ever read.

It’s time to pour one out for “can I buy you a drink?.”

Oh Joy Sex Toy reviewed the Ranger X, a dildo with three layers of silicone (!), calling it “easily the closest to a real life ‘feel’ I’ve ever come across for a dildo.”

Is this the new dating timeline?

If you have the means, privacy and opportunity to sunbathe naked at your own home, I sincerely encourage wearing sunscreen. Co-signed, a full-body sunburn from 2016 that I will never forget.

What will happen to our online relationships and worlds when we go back to in-person interactions?

Here’s how to give your partner a massage.

NSFW ASMR is hot shit.

At Salty, Kimberley Spill wrote about how cannabis allowed her to sit with sexual trauma and learn how to make time for her body.

FKA twigs is supporting (UK) sex workers during the pandemic and you can, too.

Dylan Ryan and T.Pfister

Dylan Ryan and T.Pfister in Crash Pad Series episode 306

At Salty, Mia Schachter wrote about how being an intimacy coordinator for film and TV shows made it easier to embrace having boundaries in bed:

“[Intimacy Coordinators are] much like stunt coordinators: we’re there to make the scenes look real and stay safe, but our domain is emotional safety within sex and nude scenes. We practice many forms of consent on set so we can ensure that it’s ongoing. In order to assist others in finding their boundaries, I had to get much more in touch with my own. At the same time, I was learning to listen to my gut and what my body needed. Through my healing, my body reawakened and I had this job that meant something. I had less to prove than ever. I didn’t need to convince anyone that I was good at communication, intimacy, or sex. As I entered back into the dating world, I anticipated feeling empowered to say ‘no,’ or ‘slow down,’ or ‘I’m not comfortable with that yet.’

I was right: this deeper knowledge of myself helps me say when I’m not ready in situations where I might have pushed through nerves at other times in my life. And if anyone tries to convince me that I don’t know myself in these circumstances, they can go fuck themselves because I’m certainly not going to.”