Tag: mothers

For Mother’s Day, join us for “‘Mommie Dearest’ in search of daughters” / Queerty

For Mother’s Day, join us for “‘Mommie Dearest’ in search

Supergirl: The Movie

Welcome to Screen Gems, our weekend dive into queer and queer-adjacent titles of the past that deserve a watch or a re-watch.

The Flying Turkey: Supergirl

“And it’s about here that the movie starts to break down, with the introduction of Faye Dunaway as a mysterious fortune-teller, and the even less fortunate introduction of Brenda Vaccaro as her sidekick. The relationship between the two women reminds me of Mommie Dearest in search of daughters.” —Roger Ebert, in his review of Supergirl

What, you thought we’d recommend Mommie Dearest for Mother’s Day? Please, give us more credit than that. We’re not sure anyone should ever watch that movie, even as a camp film.

For a Mommie Dearest-type campfest without child exploitation, on the other hand, we offer up this forgotten 1984 mega-production which also features Faye Dunaway devouring scenery. Supergirl aimed to revive the fading superhero genre by (gasp) casting a woman in the lead. The movie follows Kara Zor-El (Helen Slater), the cousin of Superman who, along with her folks (Mia Farrow and Simon Ward), survived the destruction of Krypton by hiding out in a pocket universe called Argo City. The colony, overseen by the wise man Zaltar (a boozy Peter O’Toole), is powered by an Omegahedron, a high-tech orb of pure energy.

When Kara accidentally loses the Omegahedron, she traces it all the way to Earth. There, a floundering witch named Selena (Dunaway) and her assistant Bianca (Brenda Vaccaro) discover the Omegahedron, and conspire to use its powers to (what else) conquer the world. When Kara arrives, she takes on the dual identity of high schooler Linda Lee/Supergirl in hopes of finding the Omegahedron, defeating Selena, and saving her people. Oh, and of course she meets a hunky school groundskeeper (Hart Bochner), who becomes the object of both Kara and Selena’s affections

In the leading role, Slater gives a winning, plucky performance that hints at just how good Supergirl really could have been. Dunaway, by contrast, snarls and howls her way through the movie, playing to the furthest rows of Yankee Stadium. Vaccaro seems to have some fun as her floozy sidekick, and their relationship seems designed for bitchy laughs. Roger Ebert had it right: all this movie needed was Selena battling Supergirl with a wire hanger.

Actually, it needed a lot more than that. As a film, Supergirl is a mess, but not a boring one. Slater delivers a damn good performance in the lead considering what she had to work with, and as such, has some terrific moments. Dunaway seems to be playing Joan Crawford playing Selena, which could be why she comes off like a tweaking drag queen. Vaccaro fares better, only because she seems to know what movie she’s in.

Weird, campy, hideous, but featuring a terrific leading performance by Slater, we suggest Supergirl in lieu of Mommie Dearest this Mother’s Day. It has the same level of campy laughs, albeit without the child beatings.

Streams on HBO Max, Amazon, YouTube, iTunes & VUDU.

One Final NoteSupergirl is available in both its 105-minute theatrical version and in an extended 124-minute version. We suggest watching the latter (which appears to be streaming on Amazon), as it contains several scenes which clarify the plot and character relationships.

Happy Mother’s Day/Mothers’ Day/Motherz Day

Happy Mother's Day/Mothers' Day/Motherz Day

Wishing a very happy day to all who claim today as their own, whether you spell it Mother’s Day, Mothers’ Day, or (my proposal from a few years back) Motherz Day. No matter what parental name your kids call you, if you want to celebrate today, then do it.

Rhodedendron flowers

We mothers are a varied lot, who include biological moms, nonbiological moms, adoptive moms, birth moms, surrogate moms, foster moms, step moms, gestational moms, genetic moms, chosen moms, lesbian moms, bisexual moms, transgender women who took on the title “mom” as they transitioned (though not all do), transgender men who prefer the title “mom” (though not all do), relatives or others who became mother figures to a child, feminine moms, masculine moms, androgynous moms, nonbinary moms, genderfluid moms, and moms who prefer no label.

We may be coupled, single, polyamorous, separated, divorced, or co-parenting with one or more non-romantic partners. We or our children may be differently abled. We are sometimes the same race, ethnicity, or religion as our children, and sometimes not. Our children may be living with us or not. They may be alive or may have passed from this life. We may be employed outside the home full time, part time, or not at all, by choice or circumstance. We are rich, poor, and in between. We are moms of one, two, or many. We’re combinations of the above and definitely a varied lot (and I’m sure I missed some variations).

I even just wrote a guest post for Gays With Kids, too, in which I hoped that all dads and men whose roles and identities incline them more towards celebrating today would do so, too. I’m happy to have more at the party. (And conversely, if you are a person more inclined to celebrate on Father’s Day or the recently created Nonbinary Parents Day, then by all means do that.)

Perhaps in an ideal world there would be no gendered parental holidays. For families with more than one parent, yes, it’s nice if each person gets their own day. Maybe the solution is to celebrate over a week, with each parent getting their own day no matter their gender, and using the remaining days to celebrate other people (donors, birth parents, etc.) or other aspects of family life (love, togetherness, respect, caring, etc.) Since different families may have different structures, this could all be up to the individual family to configure. I offer this as an idea for anyone who wants it—if your family does something like this, please leave a comment to let us know!

One additional way to celebrate during this season is on #LGBTQFamiliesDay, an event I created in 2006 as a day for online storytelling and sharing about LGBTQ families. I hold it each year at the beginning of June, which is not only the start of Pride Month, but also roughly midway between Mother’s Day and Father’s Day—honoring both, but reminding us that not all parents exist at one of those poles. Please join me on June 1, 2021, for the event’s 16th year. Simply post, tweet, or share on any social media channel in celebration and support of LGBTQ families and include the hashtag #LGBTQFamiliesDay. You can also follow the hashtag throughout the day and share the stories, images, and thoughts from other participants, and optionally, submit a link to one of your posts for inclusion in the master list of #LGBTQFamiliesDay stories. Many thanks to Family Equality for once again sponsoring the event. (Maybe I’ll take my own idea and extend it into a week in the future….)

However you celebrate and whomever you celebrate with, may today be full of joy and love.

Watch: Mothers’ Day Ad from Doritos Mexico Features Kids with Two Moms

Watch: Mothers' Day Ad from Doritos Mexico Features Kids with

Doritos Mexico has launched a surprisingly touching ad for Mothers’ Day that features real kids from two-mom families reading letters of thanks to their mothers.

In the video, created by Slap Global, six youth read from a stage to their parents, thanking them for all that they have done to help raise and support them. They speak of universals like getting dinner on the table as well as experiences specific to those with same-sex parents. We also see the real-time reactions in the mothers’ eyes as they hear their children’s words. The video has been edited to string the voices together: One girl says, “And though only one of you had me in your belly,” and the scene cuts to a boy saying, “both of you did everything to have me.” It’s a neat trick to emphasize some of the universals of their experiences while also allowing for their individual voices.

Yes, it’s getting towards the time of year when lots of companies slap rainbows on their products—but this ad is part of Doritos Mexico’s #PrideAllYear campaign, which is intended to elevate LGBTQ stories all year long. The company has also released LGBTQ-themed ads before this year (as well as rainbow-colored Doritos to support the It Gets Better Project). Additionally, PepsiCo, Doritos’ corporate parent, is an HRC National Corporate Partner, meaning they’re putting money back into LGBTQ causes. They also get a perfect 100 on HRC’s Corporate Equality Index for inclusive policies and practices.

As with last year’s ad about a young gay man bringing his boyfriend home for the holidays for the first time, this new one is designed to hit viewers in the feels—and it works. Whether it makes you run off to buy a bag of cheesy chips is another question—but if it gets these stories in front of folks who might not otherwise see them and makes someone more supportive of all types of families, then I’ll consider it a force for good.

Watch below. In Spanish with English subtitles.

Lesbian opens up about pain of being shut out of her mother’s will

Lesbian opens up about pain of being shut out of

A lesbian who was cut out of her mother’s will has described the pain of being alienated by her entire family, simply because of her sexuality.

Writing to The Oregonian, the anonymous Texan woman asks the Dear Annie advice column for help navigating a bitter family feud.

She begins by explaining that she is now estranged from her sister after a disagreement with their mother, who has since passed away.

“It was a bad falling out, as she talked my mother into making her the sole heir of her estate because I am a lesbian,” she says bluntly.

That alone would be devastating, but most painful of all is the fact that she has been cut off from her two beloved nieces, whom she helped raise.

“My niece is getting married, and I suspect I will not be invited, as I was not invited to her high school or college graduation,” she writes.

“We once were very close, but now she doesn’t want to appear a traitor to her mother, I guess.”

The woman sent congratulations after hearing of her niece’s engagement, but after meeting no response she’s left wondering if it’s worth keeping in touch at all.

“My falling out with my sister is bad enough, but my mother and sister hurt me deeply by keeping me away from my two nieces, especially after I helped raise them,” she said.

“I have not said anything in years about it and don’t care to. It’s done and over with. I think I need to walk away.”

She now asks: “Is this childish of me? Can I give myself permission to save my self-respect and dignity by unfriending them?

“I don’t want to seem petty, but my mother and sister schemed to hurt me as badly as they could, all because l’m a lesbian and they don’t approve.”

It’s a tragically familiar problem for many LGBT+ people, and The Oregonian‘s Annie Lane had nothing but sympathy for the letter writer.

“In a perfect world, our parents and siblings would support us unconditionally and never judge us,” she replied. “In your case, their disapproval sounds extreme.”

She pointed out that while we can’t control others’ actions, we can control how we respond – and cutting off contact is a perfectly valid response.

“If you want to unfriend them on Facebook, that sounds like a fine idea,” she said. “In fact, social media never really makes people feel better about themselves, so why not just deactivate your account altogether?”

She also advised speaking to a professional therapist to help her process her family’s rejection.

“Work on forgiving your mother and sister for yourself, not for them,” she suggested. “After all, forgiveness is a gift you give to yourself.”