Tag: time

HBO’s ‘His Dark Materials’ is about to introduce a whole lotta gayness. Time to catch up! / Queerty

HBO’s ‘His Dark Materials’ is about to introduce a whole

Welcome to the Weekend Binge. Every Friday, we’ll suggest a binge-able title designed to keep you from getting too stir crazy. Check back throughout the weekend for even more gloriously queer entertainment.

The Daemonic: His Dark Materials

We here at Queerty love calling attention to films and series that might not get enough recognition for their treatment of queer issues, characters or history…as well as just for being damn good entertainment. This week, we offer up possibly the most underrated show on television: His Dark Materials.

Fans of the series of novels by Philip Pullman or the ill-fated big-screen adaptation The Golden Compass will no doubt know the power and intrigue of the original story. For the uninitiated, the trilogy of novels follows a young girl named Lyra (Daphne Keene of Logan fame). Lyra lives in a universe parallel to our own, one in which souls take the form of spirit animal guides called Daemons that live outside of the body as constant companions. In Lyra’s universe, a religious government called The Magesterium rules over all creation, obsessed with a strange material called Dust which clings to all living adults.

When Lyra’s best friend becomes one of a series of children to mysteriously disappear she embarks on a thrilling adventure alongside the aeronaut Lee Scoresby (Lin-Manuel Miranda) to discover the fate of the kids…and why the Magesterium wants to use children for a deadly experiment. Armed with a magical compass that tells the future, Lyra must outwit the sadistic Mrs. Coulter (Ruth Wilson) and ruthless Lord Asriel (James McAvoy), a pair of sparring adults terrified of Dust and obsessed with young Lyra. Meanwhile, back in our universe, a put-upon boy named Will (Amir Wilson) searches for his long-lost father (Andrew Scott), and discovers a hole in space-time that leads connects Lyra’s world with our own.

That’s the tip of the iceberg folks. As a story, His Dark Materials deserves mention alongside classics such as Dune, Harry Poter, Lord of the Rings and The Chronicles of Narnia as one of the all-time great sci-fi/fantasy series. Moreover, the series includes a hearty dose of queer characters, particularly in the form of a couple of gay angels (yes, really) that show up mid-way through the story. The stories also offer a very strong critique of mixing religion with government, authoritarianism, and sexism & homophobia within the Catholic church. The HBO adaptation features a wonderful cast, breathtaking special effects and–unlike the big-screen adaptation–doesn’t hold back on the violence or the criticism of religion. With Season 2 about to premiere in the US this week, now is the perfect time to get caught up and jump on the bandwagon of one of the most addictive series in recent memory.

Come for the adventure. Stay for the gay angels.

Streams on HBO Max.

Just shot my shot by msging a girl on Reddit for the first time, got me feeling like : actuallesbians

Just shot my shot by msging a girl on Reddit

A place for discussions for and by cis and trans lesbians, bisexual girls, chicks who like chicks, bi-curious folks, dykes, butches, femmes, girls who kiss girls, birls, bois, aces, LGBT allies, and anyone else interested! Our subreddit is named r/actuallesbians because r/lesbians is not really for or by lesbians–it was meant to be a joke. We’re not a militant or exclusive group, so feel free to join up!

Pete Buttigieg and Elizabeth Warren do the ‘Time Warp’ with Tenacious D

Time Warp Buttigieg Warren

Elizabeth Warren and Pete Buttigieg joined Tenacious D to get young voters to “jump to the left”. (Tenacious D/ YouTube)

Pete Buttigieg and Elizabeth Warren did the “Time Warp” with Tenacious D in a truly iconic Rocky Horror Picture Show tribute to encourage voters to “jump to the left”.

The video is part of the Rock the Vote campaign, which urges “young people across the country to exercise their rights and represent their interests” by voting.

With just one week to go until the US presidential election, Jack Black and the rest of Tenacious D put on wigs, makeup and sequins to encourage young Americans to “Rock-y the vote”.

Sharing the video which “just saved 2020” on YouTube, Tenacious D wrote: “It’s astounding… time is fleeting… and the 2020 election is here.

“Time to ROCK-Y THE VOTE! And remember: it’s just a jump to the LEFT, and not a step to the right!”

As well as former Democratic presidential candidates Pete Buttigieg and Elizabeth Warren, the “Time Warp” cover featured footage of the Rocky Horror Picture Show cast, interspersed with a multitude of queer icons including George Takei, Ilana Glazer, John Waters, King Princess, Phoebe Bridgers and Peaches.

Posting the video on Twitter, Warren wrote: “Thanks for letting me get in on this Rocky Horror remix, Jack Black and Tenacious D!

“Remember when you’re casting your ballot: ‘It’s just a jump to the left!’” 

One commenter wrote: “This is the BEST! Since the theatres are closed this year but the polls are open, this is the next best thing!”

One Twitter user responded: “In these uncertain times seeing Elizabeth Warren in a cover of the ‘Time Warp’ does give a glimmer of hope as the gathering storm approaches on Nov 3. #AndNotAStepToTheRight.”

“Man, the starpower in this vid,” wrote another. “A worthy cover for a worthy cause. VOTE, VOTE, VOTE!!!”

It’s Time for the WNBA Finals, You Gays!

It's Time for the WNBA Finals, You Gays!

Welcome to the WNBA Finals! We did it, folks. Tonight, the number two seeded Las Vegas Aces take on the number one seeded Seattle Storm in Game 1, airing on ESPN2.

The Storm got here by sweeping the Minnesota Lynx, while the Aces went five games with the Sun. The Sun’s defense nearly shut down Vegas’ offense, but the Sun struggled to make shots and ultimately, you can’t win a game if you don’t score points. So here we are.

Seattle is a well-oiled machine and, judging by how they looked in the semis, they’re going to be hard to beat, especially with Sue Bird and Breanna Stewart locked in together. But the Aces have MVP A’ja Wilson and vet Angel McCoughtry who has just as much playoff experience as Bird.

Instead of a standard matchup preview, because that’s not really my thing, I thought we’d recap some of the out players on each team and what to watch for from each of them.


Seattle Storm

The Storm have Sue Bird. The last time the Storm were in the Finals, in 2018, they won. That was when we had masked Sue, doing superhero shit. She’s been in the WNBA since 2003 and any season now could be her last. She’s been plagued by knee injuries the last two years, but when she’s on the court she brings a quiet confidence and steady leadership to her team. Speaking of Sue Bird, maybe you’ve heard of her girlfriend?

Breanna Stewart returned from an Achilles injury this season looking like no time at all had passed. Her on-court chemistry with Bird is key to the team’s offensive flow and she was in the MVP conversation this year. There’s not really anything Stewie can’t do, and I lack the ability to break down her game in words other than “yes” and “wow.”

Natasha Howard is a key part of the Storm’s defense and when she’s also making shots on the other end of the floor, adds a lot to their game (Howard faced allegations of domestic violence from her wife last year.)

The team will be without Sami Whitcomb off the bench, as she went back to Australia to await the birth of her first child.


Las Vegas Aces

There are two players (both queer) to keep an eye on for the Aces, who will be difference makers for their team if they can get going. The first is Angel McCoughtry. McCoughty is a veteran who is in her first year with Vegas after spending 12 years with the Atlanta Dream, where she took them to several WNBA Finals appearances. She has more playoff experience than the rest of her team combined. She didn’t get a ton of minutes during the regular season and she was out last year with a knee injury so perhaps people forgot about Angel. But she reminded everyone why she is one of the best of all time in the semis, where she came out in Game 4 and casually dropped 29 points. If Angel is hot, watch out.

The other player who is sometimes overlooked but should not be underestimated is Danielle Robinson. She was insulted after the Sun hardly guarded her at all in the first game and came back determined to show she was a threat. Robinson is quick and can be quietly lethal. Don’t sleep on her. And, just because, here she is being very very cute with her wife:


Fun Stuff from the W This Week

Turns out viewership was up 68 percent this season, proving that a) there is an audience for women’s sports and b) if you put it on TV, people will watch it. LIKE WE’VE BEEN SAYING.

Last week, the Aces’ Kayla McBride opened up to The Players’ Tribune about her struggles with mental health. It’s vulnerable and real and worth a read.

There was some good trash talking on WNBA Twitter this week now that players are out of the Wubble. Candace Parker, who was named Defensive Player of the Year (voted on by media) failed to make a first or second defensive team (voted on by coaches), the first time in WNBA history that’s happened. She let the world know how she felt about it:

Meanwhile, while watching the ~questionable~ officiating in the Aces-Sun series, players shared their own experience with the refs in the Wubble.

The Aces Liz Cambage may have sat out the 2020 season, but she granted us with a Finals Week gift anyway: she posed for Playboy and talked about being 6’8” and enjoying sex. “Me doing Playboy is me celebrating my sexuality like, ‘Yeah, I am a straight six-foot-eight woman who likes to have sex.’ I’m a human; it’s what we do. As a female athlete, I feel like I’m not allowed to be sexy and I’m not allowed to be that person. All society wants from me is to sit down, shut up, go to training and play my sport.”

Marieke reviews This Is How You Lose The Time War by Amal El-Mohtar and Max Gladstone – The Lesbrary

Marieke reviews This Is How You Lose The Time War

This Is How You Lose the Time War by Amal El-Mohtar and Max Gladstone

Time War reminded me a lot of Good Omens in the sense that two agents–on opposing sides of a high stakes global war that is being fought out across time (yes, time travel) and space and universes, while also only forming a backdrop to the lives of regular unwitting humans–are not as invested in the outcome of that war as they maybe are expected to be by the leaders of those forces. And then they meet, and find they are not indifferent to each other.

Red and Blue maintain communications throughout this story, and their communications are central to the development of both the plot and the characters. These communications are presented in letter form in the book, so it reads like a semi-epistolary novel (in case that is your thing, this is a good book to pick up, as every chapter ends with a letter). Even so, these letters are really steganographical messages (a term pulled directly from the dialogue, that I actually had to go and look up – good thing too, because it was then used again shortly after in another book I’m reading!), i.e. the message was concealed within another form. What shape that form actually took (hah) differed wildly, and includes a few notable instances, but I would prefer for the reader to be surprised by them as each new letter is received.

Both characters self-identify as female, but there is at the same time little indication that sex or gender is a defining factor within their society, especially as agents on both forces are capable of easily altering their own physical forms. Sexual orientation is never mentioned and appears to be pretty much a non-issue in this environment.

The relationship between the two characters grows with each letter they send and receive, and both the letters and the relationship they create, form, and reflect are at the heart of this story. Initially the dynamic between the two characters feels a bit like a microcosm of the war that is being fought out at a macro scale (as the characters themselves observe as well), but they quickly grow beyond and above that. They do not meet physically for most of the narrative, which creates a sense of their relationship structure feeling similar to any modern long distance relationship, where different time zones and few meetings can still be the basis of a strong bond.

The development of their relationship was extremely well written and completely believable. The questions about loyalty to each other versus loyalty to the force they serve were handled quite well, and become major plot points near the end of the tale. The end is also where the story flounders a bit. Without spoiling anything, there are a few time-travel related shenanigans going on and some of it–while presented as a major reveal–can be quite expected if you’re familiar with the time travel genre in general. In that sense the story doesn’t really break any new territory, even though it tries to present the plot twists as unexpected.

Content warning: some battle violence

Marieke (she / her) has a weakness for fairy tale retellings and contemporary rom coms, especially when combined with a nice cup of tea. She also shares diverse reading resources on her blog letsreadwomen.tumblr.com.

Lil Nas X has written the ‘best kids’ book of all time’

Lil Nas X book C is for Country

C is for Country by Lil Nas X will come out on January 5, 2021. (LilNasX/ Twitter)

Lil Nas X has written a children’s book in which he and Panini the pony embark “on a joyous journey through the alphabet”.

The “Old Town Road” singer, who came out as gay in July 2019, announced on Twitter: “I’m dropping the best kids book of all time soon! C IS FOR COUNTRY, out 5 January, 2021 from Random House Kids.

“I can’t wait to share it with you all.”

According to Random House, kids aged three to seven years old will be able to “join superstar Lil Nas X… and Panini the pony on a joyous journey through the alphabet from sunup to sundown”.

The blurb continues: “Experience wide-open pastures, farm animals, guitar music, cowboy hats, and all things country in this debut picture book that’s perfect for music lovers learning their ABCs and for anyone who loves Nas’s signature genre-blending style.”

C is for Country, illustrated by Theodore Taylor III, is “a celebration of song and the power inside us all” and will also feature “plenty of hidden surprises” for adult fans of the Grammy award-winning artist.

Although some Lil Nas X fans on Twitter were disappointed that he was announcing a picture book rather than his new album, which he insists is “98 per cent done”, others were convinced that C is for Country would be a “masterpiece”.

One Twitter user wrote: “I don’t have any kids or intend to for like 20 years so I will be reading this to my dogs.”

“I haven’t touched a book in years but I’ll do it for you king,” said another.

The LGBT+ community has been disappointed by certain children’s authors recently, so one Lil Nas X fan came up with an ingenious idea. They wrote: “[I’m] telling my kids this is who wrote Harry Potter.” 

Lil Nas X recently launched a spring clothing collection with designer Christian Cowan, the mastermind behind Lil Nas X’s 2019 VMAs outfit. 

In a joint interview about the collection for Vogue, the pair revealed that 100 per cent of proceeds will be donated to the Black trans community in Atlanta, Georgia, where Lil Nas X is from.

It’s Time for the 2nd Annual “It’s Great to Be Gay” Day

It's Time for the 2nd Annual "It’s Great to Be


A pinwheel collage with "It's Great to be Gay Day" written in multicolored letters against a black background in the middle. In the pinwheel are various lesbian, bisexual, and queer writers from Autostraddle. Each of their photos has been colorized to reflect a different color of a neon rainbow.

Hi there!  Welcome to the second annual IT’S GREAT TO BE GAY DAY, an international holiday we here at Autostraddle invented three years ago, just because… well, because we can. And also because EVERY SINGLE EFFING DAY!! is A GREAT DAY TO BE GAY!

So a few things about this very silly and made-up holiday that we delight in with the utmost seriousness! A lot of LGBT holidays are about raising awareness regarding the various struggles we face and overcome, but this one (!!!)  is about quite simply about making ourselves feel good about ourselves despite aforementioned struggles. Today we celebrate all the reasons it legitimately kicks ass to be gay, lesbian, queer, bisexual, non-binary, trans, any part of out LGBTQ+ family. That’s it! Happiness! Those are the rules!

The first annual It’s Great To Be Gay Day was actually held in November, and now we are holding it in August because dates are fake and straight, but we are very real and very queer. Also we are celebrating today specifically because… drumroll please!!!… YOU HELPED US MAKE OUR $118K FUNDRAISER GOAL!! AND YOU HELPED US MAKE IT A FULL FIVE DAYS AHEAD OF SCHEDULE!!!!

We are still not over it!! We may never be over it!!! We love you all so much, and on behalf of our entire team, thank you for loving on us in return. It’s such a special gift.

Speaking of gifts, we’re gonna kick off today’s celebration by telling you why we think it’s GREAT to be whatever we are. Lesbian! Bisexual! Queer! Trans! Non-binary! The gang’s all here. And we are so glad to have you with us. ❤️

Take over the comment thread and tell us why you think it is GREAT TO BE GAY (tell us about however you identify, of course, we just liked the rhyming! Thanks again, we love you!)


A blue photo of Malic with the quote: "I get to blame every single one of my quirks on being queer, and straight people have to respect them or else they’ll look homophobic"

I’m an Olde Gaye — I started coming out when I was 13, and I’ve been some flavor of queer ever since.

In my sublime queer life, I get to date people who smell nice. I get to sidestep the heteronormative pressures of marriage, family and property ownership. I get to wear comfortable shoes for every occasion and grow gloriously long armpit hair without consequence. I get to blame every single one of my quirks on being queer, and straight people have to respect them or else they’ll look homophobic. I get to say things like, “Jessica has such Taurus top energy” and the people around me know exactly what I mean. I get tits on tits and Bound and weird haircuts. I couldn’t live any other way.


An orange photo of Kayla with the quote: " I think I say “I’m gay” at minimum once a day now, and fuck it, because for so long I never dared speak those words, so now I can say them on a loop for however long I want because those are the rules"

I love being a lesbian and a dyke, and I love the way both words feel in my mouth, and I love my girlfriend’s mouth on my mouth and her spit in my mouth. I LOVE GAY SEX. I love gay books and gay art and gay food (oysters). I think I say “I’m gay” at minimum once a day now, and fuck it, because for so long I never dared speak those words, so now I can say them on a loop for however long I want because those are the rules! I also love being constantly surrounded by queer friends, mentors, chosen family. I have a close group of friends who I’ve known for nearly a decade, and we all met on tumblr dot com before any of us knew we were queer and then one by one all came out like a gay ass set of dominoes toppling each other. We somehow magically found each other before we even knew ourselves. QUEER MAGIC.


A yellow photo of Dani with the quote: " I love love love lesbian poets and poetry and getting to experience the way women write about loving each other, its so liberating and breathtaking. "

I love being a lesbian so much, its all I ever want to talk about and think about. Being a dyke is such a huge part of my life. Having come out when I was a scared little twelve year old, I’ve learned so much about family and what it means to build one from the ground up, one that is accepting and loving and sees my full self. I love that there is so much that lesbians are open to that the straights would find taboo or gross. I think about how often cis men complain about periods and body hair and I’m so happy I don’t have to listen to that bullshit ever. I love being in the company of women, but especially other lesbians and queer women. I love talking about sex and thinking about it and HAVING GAY SEX and getting to kiss a woman everywhere omg. I love love love lesbian poets and poetry and getting to experience the way women write about loving each other, its so liberating and breathtaking. I could go on and on but I’ll end with this: being a woman that loves other women has helped me deepen and strengthen my relationships with women, romantic or platonic, in ways I don’t think I could if I were… straight. I prioritize my love for women above others and it feels so fucking good.


A blue-green portrait of Abeni with the quote: "I feel like transitioning is one of the most radical things that anyone can do and it really opens up our ideas of the boundaries of human existence, like – if I can do this, I can do anything, you know?"

One of my favorite comic people, Carta Monir, often says “being trans is a gift.” I can’t really articulate how much my understanding of the world has been opened by discovering that I’m trans.

Existing as a trans woman of color in America, in the world, actually almost killed me, but surviving that has also added another, just, beautifully nuanced and complex and difficult and dynamic layer to existence that I can’t imagine living without. I have a rare and significant understanding of gender, of sexuality, of politics, of relationship — it’s all colored by my experience of being queer, of being trans.

I feel like transitioning is one of the most radical things that anyone can do and it really opens up our ideas of the boundaries of human existence, like — if I can do this, I can do anything, you know? Human beings are such boundless creatures, just so adaptable, changeable, transformational. It really makes me feel like anything is possible, and that’s a pretty powerful feeling.


A purple photo of Shelli with the quote: "It's so dope that I get to kiss all up on people’s daughters."

It’s so dope that I get to kiss all up on people’s daughters. There are deeper things that I could say but that’s my favorite part. Also — HeteroVille is the most ghetto place on Earth, I only spent a short time there but I want my money back.


A blue portrait of KaeLyn with the quote " From chaotic bi teen to militantly queer college dyke to hard femme mommi to actual queer mama to realizing I can hold all of those forms of myself in my heart simultaneously, every version of me has been deeply queer."

I’m so glad to be a big ol’ queer. Being queer means never being stuck in someone else’s boring narrative. I’ve gone into chrysalis and emerged some shiny new form of myself many times and I know I have many more metamorphosis to look forward to. From chaotic bi teen to militantly queer college dyke to hard femme mommi to actual queer mama to realizing I can hold all of those forms of myself in my heart simultaneously, every version of me has been deeply queer. Every decision I make is made with intentionality because being queer means being written out of the dominant narrative. And that means getting the write your own story, evolving your own way, setting your own ideas about success and beauty, and that’s a beautiful fucking thing.

I never saw myself falling into the house-plus-spouse with a child-on-the-way story. In first grade, I consistently volunteered to play the family dog when we played house. I didn’t dream about weddings or husbands. I convinced my college boyfriend that marriage was a tool of the patriarchy. Up until the moment I decided I wanted to, I was firm in my conviction that I wouldn’t be a parent. But making a queer life with my queer spouse in our queer house with this incredible kid who I carried inside my queer body… nothing about that is boring. I am constantly wonderstruck by the beauty and resiliency of my queerness and the way that being queer invites happiness and perpetual evolution into my life.


I love being gay. I love being trans. I love waking up each morning and deciding whether I want to be a dyke or a faggot and usually choosing both. I love meeting other queer and trans people. I love the immediate connection that’s formed even if I decide that specific person sucks. I love all the times they don’t suck. I love my queer and trans friends. I love my queer and trans friends who met me when they didn’t know they were queer or trans and I love my queer and trans friends who knew exactly who they were. I love my queer and trans friends who thought they knew who they were but now are realizing maybe there’s more, or less, or other. I love how we get to do that — constantly reexamine and reconfigure and redeclare our selves to ourselves and to each other.

I love making straight people uncomfortable by just existing. I love that even when they hurt me I always know that my relationship to myself and my community has expanded my experience of the world in ways they’ll never even begin to understand. I love mocking them and knowing it’s not really about them, but simply the glee I feel in spending so many years trying to be them and thinking I was broken and realizing I’m not. I love knowing I’m actually this other thing with all these other people and my brain isn’t damaged, I’m just gay. I love not being normal.

I love gay movies. I love gay movies about old lesbians and I love gay movies about confused teens. I love seeing our stories on screen and knowing it’s an extension of the internal questioning that makes us queer. I love how many stories there are to tell on screen and off. I love how different we all are from each other. I love those of us who center that difference and embrace it. I love knowing that who you are doesn’t have to be who I am and who I am doesn’t have to be who you are but if we’re both queer what a fucking gift. What a fucking gift that we get to be queer. God I fucking love that.


A green photo of Heather with the quote: I love my wife. I love that I get to spend every day and every night with my best friend, forever! That was the whole entire dream of my youth; I just didn't understand why!

I can’t believe I spent so much of my life being scared to say “I’m gay” out loud, to utter the word “lesbian,” or even think about the word “dyke.” I love the word “dyke” now; I just absolutely love it. When I say it or hear another dyke say it, it’s that satisfying feeling of swinging down a hammer and hitting a nail just right. The ringing thud that just drives the point deeper. I love queer women. I love the intimate friendships we have with each other, I love the connections we have based on shared experiences that we unearth when we stay up talking all night on the day we meet, I love that we always skip the small talk, I love our pop culture and literary frames of reference, I love our hard conversations about the things that make us better people, and I love our Dungeons & Dragons games. (My D&D game is not all women, and I love my queer, nonbinary friends with such fervor too.) I love my wife. I love that I get to spend every day and every night with my best friend, forever! That was the whole entire dream of my youth; I just didn’t understand why! I love that my sex and my politics excludes the pleasure or needs of men completely. Being a lesbian is my favorite thing about myself and every day when I wake up, I’m grateful that’s who I am. It is such a lucky thing to be gay.


A blue-green portrait of Meg with the quote: " I breathe easier with my people around; get to be the fullest, most powerful, most magical version of myself without restraint or shame or apology. Being queer is such a gift, and it’s one I’m grateful for every single day. "

I feel like I spent so much of my life fighting against my bisexual and queer identity, believing that it wasn’t something that I was allowed to own, let alone celebrate — so having it now be such a powerful part of who I am, letting it shape my communities and friendships and work and play, feels like an actual miracle. I love being around my queer family, love the ways that we support and uplift each other, the ways that we call each other out and push each other to grow. I breathe easier with my people around; get to be the fullest, most powerful, most magical version of myself without restraint or shame or apology. Being queer is such a gift, and it’s one I’m grateful for every single day.


An orange portrait of Adrian with the quote: "I love being queer and bisexual and genderqueer and non-binary and trans. I ache with care and nostalgia and tenderness when I think about the journeys I have taken to each word."

I love being queer and bisexual and genderqueer and non-binary and trans. I ache with care and nostalgia and tenderness when I think about the journeys I have taken to each word. These identities evolve and flex with me, and who knows where they will take me in the future. Our elders forged these words, these understandings, these communities, and these ways out of suffocating heteronormativity and into embodiment and liberation. Friends, partners, and storytellers gave me permission to become a whole person, even when it felt like a lexical disaster. I am grateful every day to all of them.

The last It’s Great To Be Gay day in 2017, I had a different name and hadn’t yet embraced my transness. I had boobs, if you can fucking believe that! I used to worry that I wasn’t valid because of, idk, some TERF shit I saw on Twitter. I used to compartmentalize myself in search of legibility, acceptance and safety. I thought it was too many words. I internalized the fear that I was too much. Being in queer community helped me trust that my too-muchness is radical and good. I love you <3


A yellow portrait of Rachel with the quote: "I feel so lucky that however I feel hottest or most powerful or most myself, it's always brought me closer to queer community and made my relationships stronger. "

Sometimes I lose sight of how much of my life and personality are shaped by queerness, because I’m blessed enough to be surrounded by queer and trans folks in my personal life, my work life, my home, even my family. There are still plenty of reminders, though, of how deeply and inextricably my relationship to the world around me is linked to being gay, and every time they happen I’m so fucking relieved to be here. I’m so glad I don’t view other women as competition or threats and am excited to learn from and be in community with them; I’m so happy I get to view my relationships with friends, chosen family, exes, people who move between those statuses, and more as at least as important as my romantic relationships or bio family; I’m so happy I get to think of having a longterm partnership or marriage or kids as one of many potential options and not the only worthwhile thing I can do with my life! I feel so lucky that however I feel hottest or most powerful or most myself, it’s always brought me closer to queer community and made my relationships stronger. It’s fucking great how whenever I forget a hair tie during sex, my date usually has one! I love how even when our community doesn’t 110% love or even really like each other, we still try to show up for each other, because we’re what we’ve got. To be honest we’re queer and trans folks are always the smartest, funniest, realest people in the room, and even (especially!) the difficult and challenging parts of being in this community have given me so much more than I could ever put into words, and more important, have turned me into someone who wants to try to keep giving that back always.


A blue-green portrait of Carolyn with the quote: "I love queer relationships, and the ways that we are constantly creating new ways to relate to each other and new ideas of what “family” means. "

Being queer and hard femme and non-binary has given me a language to love myself and others that I never would have found otherwise. I love queer people. I love queer sex. I love queer relationships, and the ways that we are constantly creating new ways to relate to each other and new ideas of what “family” means. I love that I can approach everything in my life in a way that is distinctly queer and embodied and full of boundless possibility.


A blue green portrait of Kamala with the quote: "we really only know how to be SOOOOO ourselves for every occasion, and that makes us so fucking hot."

Being gay is the best, it just is. As I get older I have more appreciation for the parts of queer community that are sometimes considered cliche — that we can name exactly how we want to be loved and have sex, and our people will do it; that there is room for our identites to change and grow into infinity; that we really only know how to be SOOOOO ourselves for every occasion, and that makes us so fucking hot.

I also love being an angry dyke. I love rolling my eyes during bad readings by self-important white writers. I love making amab men uncomfortable by staring into their faces and not laughing at their bad jokes. I love being exasperated by the line at the grocery store and having another exasperated angry dyke open a check-stand for me. I love walking hard down the street with my hair looking sharp, and when someone with a clipboard wants to know if I have time to stop and talk about buying a cow for a family, I can just look at them, and they stop talking and we don’t even have to exchange words.


A blue portrait of Valerie Anne with the quote: "My timeline of coming out as gay and coming into my own queerness is so intrinsically aligned with coming out as a nerd and saying goodbye to the term "guilty pleasure" and loving the things I love with my whole heart."

Gosh, being queer is just the best. My timeline of coming out as gay and coming into my own queerness is so intrinsically aligned with coming out as a nerd and saying goodbye to the term “guilty pleasure” and loving the things I love with my whole heart. Maybe it WAS linked. Maybe I was hiding the nerdiest parts of me because I was afraid if people saw that part of me they’d see the gay parts too, but either way, as I shed those insecurities about being passionate, about being ME, I finally got out of my own way and was able to learn who I really was and embrace the things that bring me joy. And then I finally, finally, found friends that love the same things I do, the same way I do. I also like to see it as like a built-in people filter. Assholes and fake allies reveal themselves real quick when you’re talking about being queer all the time, which I am, or talk about your favorite shows/D&D non-stop, which I do. Not all my closest friends are queer, but all my closest friends are in my life because I am. Because I’m living my loudest, proudest, gayest, nerdiest life and refusing to apologize for it.


A blue portrait of Carly with the quote: "I love that some days I feel like a dyke and others I feel like a fag and then there are days that I feel like a little robot."

I love being queer. I love being non-binary, to be everything and nothing at the same time. I love that some days I feel like a dyke and others I feel like a fag and then there are days that I feel like a little robot. I love how expansive the word “queer” feels. I love that I’ve been surprised by my own identity over the years and how it’s changed and evolved. I love that I’m in my late 30s and I’m still learning new things about myself and I hope that process of discovery never ends. I love queer people and queer community and all the intersections therein. I love how complicated and confusing and messy it can all be. We are magic and infinite and I would honestly be really bummed to be anyone other than exactly who I am.


A light pink photo of Laneia kissing a queer human with the quote: "It's the sex for me."

It’s the sex for me.


A hot magenta photo of Sarah with the quote: "I am always going to be surrounded by the most interesting, vibrant and amazing people throughout my whole life, and there’s something so comforting about knowing that."

Being a lesbian means never having to truly be a part of hetero culture. I am always going to be surrounded by the most interesting, vibrant and amazing people throughout my whole life, and there’s something so comforting about knowing that. Also Laneia’s right — it’s the sex.


A green portrait of Riese with the quote: "It's unsurprising that it's queer women and trans folks at the forefront of so many of our most important civil rights movements, demanding accountability, pushing for change, putting in your time and adding your voice."

Gay people are just very much the most empathetic, community-minded, generous weirdos I have ever had the pleasure of sharing large crowded spaces and virtual hubs with. It’s unsurprising that it’s queer women and trans folks at the forefront of so many of our most important civil rights movements, demanding accountability, pushing for change, putting in your time and adding your voice. You make personal sacrifices for the greater good like it’s NBD, like straight people are in line at Mendocino Farms for a Sophisticated Chicken and Prosciutto Salad and you’re selling kd lang and en vogue cassettes from the ’90s for 33 cents each on your lawn to make a $10 donation to your local mutual aid fund. We are also very self-deprecating. Another nice thing about being gay is that you’re legally allowed to continue wearing sneakers with formal pants, hoodies as coats and/or dressing like a teenage boy well into your twilight years. Also a lot of us (not me) are very handy around the house.


An organe portrait of Carmen with the quote: "I’m more comfortable in my skin now as a queer woman than I ever did when I was pretending to be straight. And thank goodness! It turned out that everything that I thought was wrong with me was actually so right."

The thing about being queer, which no one told me before, is that it is absolutely magic. It’s the rabbit hole in Alice in Wonderland. It’s Willy Wonka’s Chocolate Factory and we all have the golden ticket. I remember once being so scared to come out — I never knew that it would allow me to come into myself. I’m more comfortable in my skin now as a queer woman than I ever did when I was pretending to be straight. And thank goodness! It turned out that everything that I thought was wrong with me was actually so right. Usually when people ask me, I say I love being queer because “queerness is freedom” but more than that — it’s a RELIEF. It’s a breath of fresh air. It’s going home. Because it is being at home in yourself.


A yellow photo of Nicole with the quote: "I’m overwhelmed that I can be a part of a community that isn’t afraid to ask questions, to dismantle structures that are harming us, to dream of better and fundamentally different futures — and then who go out and FUCKING make it happen"

I’ve always said that I’ve been grateful to be queer — and this is predicated on me realizing my gayness when I was eleven or twelve — because the environment around me at the time was all very fire and brimstone when it came to being in any way not straight. And knowing, without a doubt, that I was queer in that world where it was not acceptable to be the way I was (before I was even old enough to even consider dating anyone meaningfully) was important to my development as a critical human. By questioning one thing, “Am I really going to Hell for all these witchcraft and homosexuality things?” — I was suddenly invited to question EVERYTHING. And that questioning has led me on such an incredible journey. When I think about queerness and how I am also queer, I’m overwhelmed that I can be a part of a community that isn’t afraid to ask questions, to dismantle structures that are harming us, to dream of better and fundamentally different futures — and then who go out and FUCKING make it happen. Also I get to love astrology with abandon and look at that paragraph and be like: all this makes sense as an aqua/sag/sag. There is really very little water in my chart.

I love queer sex and I love gay love and gay not-love because-fuck-you-it’s-not-all “love is love.” I love queer friendship and the way gay people lift each other up and more often genuinely want the best for each other. I love my weird, queer home with my partner where we’re at once infinitely young and ridiculous — and at the same time “two old biddies” according to my mom. When I open my eyes in the morning and Sadie’s there and then I go water the vegetables and herbs and watch our sweet aged dog get up to mischief and I brew coffee and make toast and bring her breakfast on a tray because that’s our routine every morning — breakfast in bed together before I start work — it’s really great to be gay.


A green portrait of Christina with the quote: "Queerness is big enough to hold every facet of my personality: cynical and loyal and funny, often kind of faggy and always blasting a Broadway Cast Recording"

Here is the thing about being gay: it slaps. I didn’t come out until I was twenty six, and while it wasn’t like my life before was particularly bad, it was kind of dull. Now? Well, look, sometimes I am still a cranky bitch, but baby, that’s just the kind of gay I am! Queerness is big enough to hold every facet of my personality: cynical and loyal and funny, often kind of faggy and always blasting a Broadway Cast Recording. You know what also slaps? The sex. Sometimes literally!!!! [crowd boos] I am right and I am brave to say it!


A light pink portrait of Vanessa with the quote: " I love knowing there are a million and seven ways to live a big gay life and all of them rule."

Here are just a few things I love about being gay, in no particular order: I love sweaty gay dance parties, I love making out with my gay friends, I love being a dyke writer and reading other dyke writers, I love knowing there are a million and seven ways to live a big gay life and all of them rule, I love queer community, I love our gay history, I love our gay elders, I love the gay youth, I love being a fat dyke with body hair, I love gay astrology, I love gay memes, I love gay art, I love gay competence, I love gay brilliance, I love gay sex.

Being gay — being queer — being a dyke — is the best thing that ever happened to me. What more is there to say?


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Winona Ryder recalls that time she experienced Mel Gibson’s homophobia / Queerty

Winona Ryder recalls that time she experienced Mel Gibson’s homophobia

Stranger Things and Beetlejuice actress Winona Ryder has shared an unfond memory of fellow actor/director Mel Gibson, claiming that she once witnessed him hurl antisemitic and homophobic remarks during a party.

Ryder recalled to The Sunday Times her experience as a Jewish woman in Hollywood, and how studio bosses–including one who is Jewish himself–would scrutinize her looks, deciding if she looked too Semitic for a role. She also recalled her unpleasant encounter with Gibson.

Related: Mel Gibson Hates You Fags, Too

“We were at a crowded party with one of my good friends,” Ryder said. “And Mel Gibson was smoking a cigar, and we’re all talking and he said to my friend, who’s gay, ‘Oh wait, am I gonna get AIDS?’ And then something came up about Jews, and he said, ‘You’re not an oven dodger, are you?’”

Ryder also claims Gibson tried to apologize after the exchange.

Oscar-winner Mel Gibson has long come under fire for a history of antisemitic, homophobic and misogynistic remarks. In 2006, leaked audio of the actor during a DUI arrest went viral, notably for calling a female police officer “sugar t*ts” and saying “Jews are responsible for all the wars in the world.” In 1991, the actor made homophobic remarks to the Spanish publication El Pais for which he later refused to apologize. Gibson’s films Braveheart and The Passion of the Christ have also come under fire for homophobia, with the latter also coming under extreme fire for anti-Jewish stereotypes.

Republican Party renews attacks on us just in time for pride

Republican Party renews attacks on us just in time for

“Gays for Trump” at rally in Lynden, Washington, on Saturday, May 7 (via NPR)

The Republican National Convention has announced its 2020 platform will feature renewed opposition to marriage equality, LGBTQ rights, and will endorse conversion therapy.

The New York Times reports that the tone-deaf announcement (which comes during pride month and during renewed queer activism in solidarity with Black Lives Matter) is a move to repackage the party’s 2016 platform as new, rather than adopting fresh positions. The move also comes at a time when the RNC has tried to promote Trump as the most pro-queer President in history.

The Times reports “The 2016 platform that is being renewed was the result of messy debates in Cleveland, the host city of the Republican convention four years ago, during which a group of renegade delegates tried but failed to strip out language opposing gay marriage and condoning conversion therapy for L.G.B.T.Q. youths.”

“The platform made a steadfast case against same-sex marriage and called for a constitutional amendment overturning the 2015 Supreme Court decision that struck down laws defining marriage between one man and one woman,” the Times also notes. “And it blames ‘the current President’ for seeking to expand workplace protections to include L.G.B.T.Q. people.”

via Queerty

It’s Time To Step Up – KitschMix

It’s Time To Step Up – KitschMix

To us, strength has no identity, and solidarity should have no race.

We can’t continue with business as usual. This week, we’re suspending our regular schedule to focus on content related to this struggle, the fight against white supremacy and the fight for Black lives and Black futures

We’re working hand-in-hand with our team to shape our plan for better representation, not just for now, but for forever.

It’s on us – all of us – to learn about racial prejudice, to develop the understanding of those who don’t, and to take time to self-educate on the challenges under-served communities face. Not just in America, but across the world.

This week all our channels will be used to educate and encourage others to fight for a positive change – we will work to support our local communities and develop further initiatives.

We’re utilising our internal education platform to circulate – and give access to – a library of resources, in order to increase the awareness of equal rights.

This initiative aims to provide a deeper understanding of the injustice and inequality that millions still face.

It’s time to donate

Black Lives Matter pioneer in the movement to fight for freedom, liberation and justice. Leading the way in providing a voice for Black people, BLM provide the resource for further understanding of racial prejudice, opening the eyes of the world to the challenges many people face, whilst offering an opportunity to make change.

With hundreds of charities helping communities, we understand that it can be difficult knowing where to direct your charitable donations.

By no means a comprehensive list, here is a short index of organisations that you can donate to right now to make an immediate difference.

  • Black Lives Matter – a global organisation which creates space for Black imagination and innovation, whilst providing an educational platform.
  • Black Visions Collective – a black, trans, and queer-led social justice organisation and legal fund based in Minneapolis-St. Paul.
  • The Bail Project – a nonprofit that aims to mitigate incarceration rates through bail reform.
  • We love Lake Street – an organisation helping to rebuild the Lake Street community in Minneapolis which has been affected by recent riots.

Ways You Can Help

As well as the educational resources below, being vocal is a crucial step in gaining awareness and promoting the need for change. 

Here is a list of petitions and further ways you can help.

Educate yourself

There is no guidebook to eradicate racism. There are however, multiple insightful resources and learnings that have been published to help educate you, and your community on the history behind the movement. 

Below, a variety of non-fiction, and fiction works by authors that help paint a visual representation of both pain and injustice, which aim to unite all races in the fight for equality and freedom.  

NETFLIX

BOOKS / AUDIBLE